Kennaโ€™s Home

Okay kids …

Here’s the scoop,

If anyone thinks that anything we,

As transsexuals,

Face, endure, and do …

As part of our attempt to relieve ourselves of a crescending gender dysphoria,

Is elective …


There is absolutely no way I can even begin to describe how far up one’s ass they have themselves.

Because the emotional and physical pain …

That we’ve hidden from the world for so long …

Is very, very extreme.

Today …

We’re seeing the physical pain.

Kenna’s pain.

Kenna made it back to the room about 6:45 p.m.

And like any who have had ffs …

Is in a great deal of discomfort,

And pain.

In her case …

Her head is tightly wound in compression padding,

Wrapped in a cute pink tape (that does match her pajamas) …

This for the purpose of trying to contain the exceptional amount of swelling that’s bound to follow.

Her eyes …

Already black and blue,

Are pretty much swollen shut at this point,

And will be even more so by tomorrow.

Lubricant to the eyes only made by someone lifting open one eyelid at a time and dropping one of three different medicinal solutions, each for a different occasion.

Her nose is covered with a splint …

And the tip of her nose has drainage gauze covering it.

Her lips are swollen beyond any sort of reasonable recognition,

And her neck is likewise covered with the compression padding and gauze.

A drainage collecting receptical, attached to the compression padding, hangs from the side of her head.

The packing in her nose leaves her only avenue of breathing through her mouth …

Which is not the easiest thing in the world to do when you’re struggling to take a simple sip of water …

Or coughing up blood,

In between the couple of hours, if your lucky,

Of uninterrupted sleep you’re able to muster.

Communicating when you’re in such a condition,

Is not the easiest thing in the world to do,

But …

She has clearly said “My jaw hurts“,

Repeated “I hate this“,

And sincerely stated “Thank you Dr. Z” as she gripped his hand. ๐Ÿ™‚

To say Kenna is doing fine,

Is misleading …

Because no one is really “fine” after suffering through the surgery she has endured.

But to say Kenna is doing as well as one could hope for …

Is not misleading in any sense,

And is completely true.

Her surgery went well and all of her procedures were completed as planned.

And though in a great deal of discomfort and pain,

She’s been a trooper …

Finally sleeping soundly in her bedroom.

I’m so happy for and proud of her !

You simply can’t help but be impressed, respect, and in awe of her. ๐Ÿ™‚

What an amazing woman.

Now of course,

She’s not through it yet …

It’ll totally suck for at least another 24 hours,

Then it’ll really suck for a few more days.

So please keep your good thoughts and positive wishes for her …

But know for now,

She’s out of surgery,

Has knocked off another item on her checklist of getting on with life,

Is resting soundly,

And on her road to recovery !! ๐Ÿ™‚

Thanks again to all for checking in on her !!

I know she appreciates it !!

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  1. Some people don’t and will never get it. Screw em. Your brother sounds like a gem. And you my dear are 100% woman in my eyes.
    Best of luck to you,
    P.P. ? Melissa

  2. Well, I’ll put this thread to bed now.

    It rained on my parade. So what. I know who I am, and thats the best feeling in the world. I’m never ever going to have doubters or naysayers rule my life. They just won’t.

    Thanks everyone for speaking up! I ‘preciate it!


  3. you misunderstand me. “defeat” implies a contest. there is none here. you are ignorant, and your “opinion” in this matter has no bearing. being what it is, neither is that opinion open to education, any more than my perspective is available to you for argument. do you really expect me or anyone else here to say “gee… you’re right. i’m just a tourist and i’ve got it so easy compared to you. forgive me for ever pretending to be anything beyond the boundaries of your imagination”?

    i’m not telling you how you think. you’ve made it quite clear what you think and i hope i’ve said nothing to indicate a belief that it can be changed.

    or that i care.

  4. I am not accepting defeat. But I do think that we can all agree to disagree. I DO choose to not create any more of an issue that has already been created.

    It is not my place to determine someone’s life path & it is not yours to tell me how I think.

  5. >I don’t understand it & probably never will.

    truer words were never spoken. you write from a position of prejudice and ignorance, and disingenuously claim to “not mean to be hard-hearted” while at the same time pulling the victimhood hierarchy trip.

    a transsexual woman will never experience menses. a transsexual man will never have have prostate cancer.

    and neither has it “easier” than a natal woman or man. only different.

    screw you.

  6. Donna, you are the one who opened this can of worms.

    Are you conceding defeat because you can’t answer any of Clio’s trenchant observations or comments?

    Since I assume that is the case, I’ll accede to your truce for here, at this time, and in this venue, because this is Amy’s sandbox, and her rule is “play nice, or don’t play here.”

    You will, however, be hearing from me, with cc’s to everyone posting on this thread, as well as to my brothers.

    For everyone else –
    Donna’s last post was 4 Aug 11:41pm and there have been no others since then. That makes it close to two days (including the time zone differences) since anyone but Clio has posted.

    I truly hope Donna’s “gratuitous nastiness” (a Betsy Carter-ism) hasn’t given anyone a free pass to simply ignore her. This might be one of the times when one of skylark’s righteous warriors should step up to the plate….

    …or maybe it’s my turn, since I have no agenda but the right, and no vested interest but my sister?

    anyone with comments on this, please email me. This is not the place.

  7. Ok everyone, let’s call a truce.
    McKenna is my new sister-in-law and we are not ready for her. I don’t understand it & probably never will. I might be natal woman, married, hetero, not able to carry to term, with adopted children so I have my faults. Yet I don’t get the picture. I won’t be posting anymore. I prefer it to let it die here. Too much damage to the family has taken place & I don’t need to add to it.
    Hope you all lead happy & productive lives in peace.

  8. Hello Donna,

    Originally, I was soo incensed by what you posted that I was going to verbally eviscerate you, but…. upon reflection choose not to, why? Well, for starters, this is Amy’s home and whilst we are visitors here, we must respect Amy’s house as we would anyone else’s home that we might visit and also, that would perhaps play right into whatever the real reason is behind you posting your comment. So let me begin.

    Amy replied in a very dignified and eloquent manner and I think she covered pretty much all of what I would have written but I’ll add my personal slant to the mix.

    Who am I? I am more than the sum of all my parts as is every other TS woman on this planet.

    I am so sorry to burst the bubble, (and I do feel bad that she is suffering), however, anyone who is not born a female does not have a clue as to the pain that we endure.

    allow me to retort.

    Well – nice of you to point that out Donna. Yes, it is true, we (TS women) won’t experience, PMS, menstrual cycles, fertility issues, pregnancy, menopause, hot flashes or even childbirth. We are all too acutely aware of this fact, I, along with probably every other TS woman on this planet have mourned that fact – a constant reminder of our lost childhood, our lost teen years where we watched the girls in our families bond with each other all the while knowing that were experiencing an incongruity, a dissonance that no child should ever have to experience and then, for some of us who are soo deep in denial – the loss of our hedonistic 20’s, where we get to experience the world through the eyes of a young woman with no responsibilities, when you can enjoy being a single woman.

    Also I do not know 1 female that wouldn’t go running (or hasn’t already gone) for the scalpel to get back our lost youth. There would be no pain – it would be a welcome pleasure! We’d be giddy with glee. Could that be a sure sign that once a woman always a woman, and others who try to be, just can’t cut the mustard???

    To suggest that we go under the knife in an effort to get back our lost youth is an extremely uninformed statement to make. I’m not sure what part of your assertion I’m more insulted by, the fact that you actually wrote it or the fact that you clearly didn’t even bother to research and understand why we would do something as dangerous and life changing as FFS – we don’t do it to slow the effects of aging, or even to try and get back a youthfull look – we do so that we might live without fear in a society whose expectations of what women should look like determines the steps she must take in order to fit in, we don

  9. Editor’s Note: This comment is being held pending explanation by the poster as to what they are trying to say, as since my reading of the comment suggests that once again there is clearly a violation of my “Play Nice At My Website” rule I have here.

    If the poster desires to e-mail me and clarify what message they are trying to convey, it would be appreciated.

  10. ‘Donna’ –
    I don’t know you or your history … I’ve just read your first post here and found it misusing pronouns with a tone while asserting that someone having extensive surgery and feels pain isn’t a woman … I am only asking you to be courteous with your comments, if you have questions, feel free to ask them, but be nice in your manner.

    My childbirth reference was mentioned as an example … as it is one often tossed at me as why in some people’s mind I will never be a woman, since I’ll never give birth … so if that’s a determining factor in what makes a woman in their minds … it should apply to all people, which means according to their definitions, even natal females who for whatever reason don’t give birth, are really not women.

    If my example hits home to you, I understand why you perceive it as a low blow … it’s something trans girls get hit with often and we don’t like it either. But it’s really no different than any other child-birthing characteristic, i.e. menstral cycles, fertility issues, pregancy, menopause, and hot flashes, that some people deem as physical requirements for woman-hood and point out to a trans-girl highlighting their physical defect as an example of why they really aren’t women.

    You’re saying something different now about going under the knife … before you suggested if one complains about the pain, they can’t cut the mustard of being a woman … now you’re saying it’s about approaching the surgery “with pleasure”. I think all of us who have had such surgery, though being scared to death at times, have looked forward to it as freeing and confirming … so there was pleasure in it. But that doesn’t mean the surgeries don’t hurt … they do … and just because a person admits it, doesn’t make them less of a woman.

    You say you can’t imagine any person “choosing to be a woman” … that’s a good point … but we’re not “choosing” to be, we are. Just as you are … you were just fortunate that your body matched your brain from the outset. Some of us weren’t so lucky. The person, the being, the soul is why a person is a man or woman, the physical traits just determine how others interact with them … sometimes those physical traits have to be corrected.

    Well … just because you think trans-girls have it easy … doesn’t mean that they still aren’t women. Heck, a wealthy child who didn’t have to work his or her way through college gets an easy deal in some people’s eyes … but that doesn’t make them any less of a college student … it just makes the people who suggests they are less of a college student seem a little jealous … even if they aren’t.

    Yeah … the whole “you don’t have periods” gets tossed at me frequently … and it hurts. Sure, the women that bitch about having them gripe about the pain, discomfort and uncomfortability … but they don’t bitch when they are able to have children. I would gladly endure menstral cycles, fertility issues, pregancy, menopause and hot flashes if that meant I could have the possibility, not even guaranteed, of having children. I’m a woman inside … in me there is an inherent desire to have children … and when natal women throw the fact that I can’t at me … it’s like rubbing it in my face. Most of the time I’m sure they don’t mean it like that … but sometimes, you can tell … it’s meant to convey the child-birthing requirement for woman-hood in their mind.

    Thanks for posting and I hope you continue to visit ! ๐Ÿ™‚

  11. ‘Amy’ –
    I was not in any way trying to be malicious or hard hearted. I just don’t understand. Natal women go through PMS, menstral cycles, fertility issues, pregancy, menopause, hot flashes and yes, childbirth which no transgendered person will ever have to experience. Knowing all this & having experienced MOST of them, by no means would I want to be a male, but I can’t imagine anyone wanting to choose to be a woman. The transgendered get out easy as far as I’m concerned, in that respect.

    And yes, I WOULD go under the knife with pleasure to change my looks.

    Oh & by the way, good job on the low blow about childbirth……..

  12. You’re certainly entitled to your opinion Donna, but seems to me that everyone, regardless of gender, endures pain … I’m not sure that natal females have that market cornered. And I’m not necessarily sure all women experience the “same” pain, in fact, I’m not even sure what “pain” you’re referring to that only natal women experience … childbirth, maybe?? If so, then that’s fine as long as you maintain the position that any natal female who doesn’t have any children is also not a woman as you define woman. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion … just be consistent and avoid being a hypocrit.

    As far as looking younger, you’re mistaken on the surgery … it’s not for “fountain of youth” purposes, in some cases it consists of cutting open the scalp, pulling back the face, shaving down bone structures, possibly cutting out part of one’s forehead to shave it down further, and then wiring it back in one’s head … all without one iota of an impact on one’s appearance of age … though you often do get to experience a total loss of feeling on one’s scalp. If you would run to that surgery, giddy with glee, then fine … but I’d like to think that any woman who doesn’t need to do that surgery in an attempt to fit in more with society … would be wise enough not to do it, and for those that do feel they need it (and “natal” girls get the same surgery for the same purpose) … wouldn’t be discredited as you seem to suggest … but when they admit that the procedure hurts, respect them for still doing it and “cutting the mustard” as you say.

    Regardless, you don’t have to accept me as a woman … as I certainly don’t have to accept you as one.

    Also, I respectfully request that if you choose to post comments here in the future, and you’re certainly welcome to do such, that you use the pronouns for how we present ourselves and that you refrain from mean-spirited or attacking language … otherwise your comments will either be edited or deleted.

    There are enough hateful people in the world and I don’t want that brought here … whether you are male, female, natal, trans or whatever, as long as you have a good heart, kind soul and hearty laugh … you’re welcome here, a little intelligence would be nice, but hey, it’s not required, I’m here afterall. ๐Ÿ™‚

    I have all sorts of different viewers from all spectrums of society … and we’re not mean to each other … I would like to keep it that way.

  13. I am so sorry to burst the bubble, (and I do feel bad that she is suffering), however, anyone who is not born a female does not have a clue as to the pain that we endure. Also I do not know 1 female that wouldn’t go running (or hasn’t already gone) for the scalpel to get back our lost youth. There would be no pain – it would be a welcome pleasure! We’d be giddy with glee. Could that be a sure sign that once a woman always a woman, and others who try to be, just can’t cut the mustard???

    Editor’s Note: This comment has been edited. Amy.

  14. Makenna, I’m sorry I got to the “party” late, but I just want to add my encouragement. I wish you the greatest happiness. It sounds like things will only get better from here. There are those of us who still face getting run over by “the truck.” When my turn comes, I’ll remember you made it through, even though for awhile it was hell.



  15. Thats Victoria…very kewl chica!

    My big bro is a wonderful person, and I so dearly love him. He’s as wonderful as he sounds.

    Bad news: I discovered this am that my left side cheek implant may have moved. My face felt tender and swollen on the left side so I went to the immediate care facility here in town so that someone could take a look. I thought it might be infected or something.

    The nurse first asked me all about my surgery, and complemented me (yuck yuck)…I entertained the idea of telling her my “function” for public relations efforts on behalf of transfolks…but then decided not to.

    The MD came in and poked/prodded the site, and said that she thought the implant may have shifted. She said the intra-oral incision site also looked a bit inflamed, so she prescribed a round of antibiotics. She also asked me, before she handed me the script whether I got yeast infections from antibiotics. Guess that’s to be expected….

    Meanwhile, I’ve got a APB out for Dr. Z…who is on vacation somewhere. I paged him and his office as well…

    Is it another trip to Chicago?
    We’ll find out…Stay tuned for another episode of: MAK’N’ CHEESE!


  16. Greg – I’m laughing my ass off…..obviously, you’ve got some waaaay kewl girls there (Makenna’s included in that)…too funny:) yep, me thinks you’re going to be the big over protective brother of the babe sister….wow is about all I can come up with to describe how Makenna looks so far….


  17. You guys should see Makenna. She is looking SOOOO much better, SOOOOO girl. I’ve seen other “before and afters” and was amazed what just a little “touching up” can do — I can’t wait to see the 3 month, 6 month, 10 month, 12 month afters for Makenna. It will be difficult for me to really SEE the differences until I see the photo comparisons – I see her every day, and she just looks like Makenna to me now. But I have a sneaking suspicion that I’m in for a babe of a sister.

    She is really feeling MUCH better. Up and around, out to dinner, movies, guests for dinner, and the business of her business is almost back to full force. I’m part of that now, and it really makes me happy to see her so engaged again.

    Amy-wan, are Amanda and Nichole strong with the force yet? From the Hooters post, it sounds like Yoda has been tutoring them ’round the clock!

    I found out (I have my ways) that YY women often have names for their — well — hooters, too. My wife and oldest daughter have no intention of telling me what, but my youngest daugter (14, almost 15 yrs) has no such compunction. Her’s are named “Bob and Bertha.”

    “Bob?” said I? “Bob?”

    Well, it turns out that “Bertha” is the big [her left] one, and Bob just sorta “bobs” around in her bra. Besides, she says, “…they’re a couple!”

  18. Woo hooo !!!! I’m glad to see you’re back on-line !! ๐Ÿ™‚

    No thanks necessary, I felt honored that you let me be there to assist ! ๐Ÿ™‚

    Hee heh … yuhpers … you bet !! I sure did know what truck was about to hit you … been there, done that ! ๐Ÿ™‚ You went in like a trooper … whereas me … when I entered the room, in my mind … I was practicing my litte girl scream !! ๐Ÿ™‚

    You’re looking great … phreaking gorgeous.



  19. I want to personally thank Amy-wan for the wonderful way she helped out while I was laid up in Chi town. I was really sad to see her leave cause her presence is so reasuring.

    As we sat in the consult rom at Dr. Z’s office on the morning of my surgery, she had this look on her face that just calmed me down a whole lot. She KNEW that the truck was about to hit me, and yet she was able to make me just a little less fearful of what was about to happen.

    Thank GOD for my sister. Thank GOD for my brother.

    Thanks to everyone that have written here, with their encouraging words and positive vibes.

    I still hurt. I’m still depressed. I hate going out yet, but I know that all wlll subside over time as my face takes on its new shape.

    Love to all…


  20. It’s great to hear that Makenna is back home safe and sound. ๐Ÿ™‚ Hope the rest of your recovery is as smooth. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Take care, and fast healing.

    p.s., thanks Amy, for posting all the updates. And Greg, you sure sound like an awesome, awesome, guy! Everyone should have a brother like you. ๐Ÿ˜€

  21. Hi Makenna – From a fellow traveller

    Be on the look out for various levels of crash and burn that can come and go during the first weeks.

    I am 3.5 weeks post Z right now and had a major meltdown tonight. I will be OK but it is really easy to be blind sided especially as the pain may continue quite a long time even if it abates occasionally and there may be less and less immediate support at your fingertips along with more and more feelings surfacing.

    It helps sometimes that I developed my self care routine early on. Though at first it was confusing and difficult (I had no one other than paid caregivers only for about 2.5 days and then a little help from some fellow travellers here and there. By having my routines become internalized, I have always been able to give myself something to get done for myself when everything else seemed to be getting shaky. I may have had to pace myself at moments but at least I could just put one foot in front of the other, stopping to cry a lot when needed.

    In any case , what is done is done, and if you are like me you will find more and more space to celebrate, to mourn and to get on with life.


  22. Wooo hooo !! I’m glad to hear you two make it home safe and sound ! ๐Ÿ™‚

    Hopefully being home and in her brand new bed and bedroom will make her feel more comfortable !

    Thanks for letting us know you made it back ! ๐Ÿ™‚

  23. Hello all
    Greg here. It’s 9:30pm est Sat 10 July

    What happened was that Makenna decided to use the computer as a very expensive cd player, and the water and lemonade that was splashed onto the nightside table ended up in the computer – not much, but enough to do a happy dance on the motherboard ROM. The computer, being an electrical device, was not happy about that, and so decided not to talk to Makenna anymore. Well.

    Whole bunches of stuff has happened, but now she is safely ensconsed in her new bed, in her new bedroom, at this minute. We left Chicago O’Hare on on an American Fokker 100 at 1:38 pm CST, and arrived, after an incredibly uneventful flight, home about 25 minutes early at 4:09 pm est. Time in the air: abt 1:50. Time in the hot stuffy miserable overcrowded (I love flying in a public conveyance) plane was abt 4:09. Makenna did well, especially after I found her a scarf to put around her head.
    Will finish later. Gotta go out and get some antiseptic for later this evening when I go back to tend to her.

  24. Okay … I spoke with Makenna today !! ๐Ÿ™‚

    Woo hooo !!!

    She’s still in Chicago … leaving tomorrow afternoon.

    She said to tell everyone “she’s still alive”, but she definitely wants to get home.

    From what I understand, her results are looking great, but that she’s still uncomfortable and just not enjoying the aftereffects of surgery.

    Greg the Great has continued to be super … and hopefully she’ll feel more comfortable once she gets home.

    I’ll post more as I hear anything, you kids do likewise please ! ๐Ÿ™‚

  25. I got a voice-mail from Greg yesterday afternoon indicating that there was a computer problem, i.e. The Pepsi Syndrome, except with h2o … and that he wasn’t going to be able to update until he figured something out. If I’m not mistaken, they should be home, home by now … so maybe she’ll actually visit here herself soon ! ๐Ÿ™‚

  26. Darn I wish I would have known that updates were being posted here. Glad I finally found it tho. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Eep, sorry I didn’t know it was your Birthday on Sunday Greg, I would have so brought you a card or maybe a cupcake with a candle in it when I stopped by. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Anywhoo belated birthday wishes to you. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Glad to hear Makenna is doing well. If I hadn’t had to work non stop all week I would have stopped by more and maybe could have helped with your care giver burnout Greg.. You are an awesome bro BTW.

    Many HUGS to both Makenna and Greg.

  27. Makenna:

    Hope you are beginning to feel a little better – can’t say I know how you must be feeling as I’ve never been through it myself…but having read other post-operative reports, I have an idea. So, all I can do is offer a big(((HUG))) & tell you we love you lots & lots and may you be up and about, flirting with the medical staff by the weekend (in true Makenna style). Your Bro is amazing

  28. Greg,
    thanks for another nice update.

    As far as burnout of being a caregiver goes, I certainly can empathize with that. I take care of my best friend, and it happens.

    I’m sorry to hear that Makenna suffered that old standard, post-op depression. Lots of kind words and actions will work to bring her out of it. Oh, and having a wonderful brother there doting over and caring for her will bring her out of it the fastest, so you’re the best antidote she could have.

    Makenna has my warmest wishes for quick recovery!

    Lisa iMom

  29. Makenna & Greg, thanks for the updates. Sounds like Makenna is going through the same recovery that Amy went through. The process sucks but the results for Amy were wonderful. Hang in there Makenna, and keep up the good work Greg. Shaft

  30. That much surgery and general anethesia can work a number on anyone. That’s why post-op depression is frequent. It’s something else she has to muddle through. In for a penny….

  31. Makenna update
    via Greg

    Hey , everybody.

    Sorry it’s been so long since the last update, but something I never thought would happen, did. I got hit with care giver burnout.
    I think it’s a function of my disability and my age, because it has never hit me before – which is probably why I didn’t recognize it as it started sneeking up on me.

    OK, so, my sister was taken out of the bandages (all except the nose splint) the other night – and was very dismayed to find that it didn’t make that much difference in the way she felt – immediately. She was even more shocked to find that she was going to hurt even MORE now that the bandages were off. The two, combined (I think) with her feelings of betrayal and abandonment by her other brothers and her mother — as well as some deep-seated pissed-offedness at one or two of the d-wads she has to work with — to bilge and sink her into quite a deep funk. I’m struggling with her and it. I think there may also be a hormonal element also — the Dr. seems to think so.
    Wait…..someone’s at the door

    I’m back. Just took delivery of FLOWERS AND GODIVAS from THE GIRLS!
    WOW! NIIIEEEESSSSE! SHE (MAKENNA)IS GONNA “PHREAK” (Amy-ism) when she awakes to THESE! (she is out cold at the moment). BIGTIME KUDOS are going out to Laura, Amy, Kate, Clio, Jennifer and Rebecca!!!!
    I’m just a big-ole dumb boy, and even I LOVE these! WOW!!!!
    I’ll say thanks for my sister, and let her express the rest later when she is better able. WOW!

    back to y’all later.

    Makenna & Greg

  32. Makenna update
    via Greg

    My sister is down for the night, tucked in, deep in a slumber, cool to the touch, finally relaxing.

    Her face is changing by the hour. As I look at her sleeping, even as swollen and injured as she still is, Old Boy Name is fading slowly. Someone I thought I knew, but oddly enough had never really met, is beginning to emerge.

    Before she went down tonight, even she finally had to admitt she could see it – “Do you think I could ever be as pretty as Meg Ryan?” I told her it was now becoming well within the range of possibility.

    We`await Dr. Z, and release, tomorrow evening.

    G’nite all.


  33. Thanks for all of the updates on Makenna; also she is blessed to have people like you around her. She is special to many of us.

  34. Makenna update
    via Greg

    Ok. Thanks SO much for the posts. I’m gonna address each one from Yodette at 7:17 pm 4 July to the end, but FIRST, after all, this is about Makenna.

    “what a difference a day makes,
    24 little hours…”
    Never said better…
    WOW! Up on her own, bathroom and eating a little, a little midwestern TV, self-care (nasal saline – “no, I want to do it. You’re doing everything else, I want to do this!”) (OK!). Eyes FAR less swollen, FAR more open, even becoming expresive again — and just artificial tears once in a while for a little extra lube (to keep me happy, I think, patronizing me into thinking I’m doing my job) instead of the gooey medicinal stuff you have to “crack” off in the morning.
    Her lips haven’t gone down that much yet, but her mouth at least appears to have become much less swollen inside, so it seems she is finding it much easier to speak. We’re TALKING and having conversations, hugging and crying together.
    She is even willing to listen and put off taking the vicodan for an hour or so more than usual – (I will address this later) – although she does love her Valium.
    But you know, on reflection I think that’s because she has become so bored, and, being the type A that she is, and unable to do anything like read, just wants to be foggy so she avoids boredom right now. I’m not at all concerned about the Valium in her case – because although one CAN become psycologically dependent on it, it can’t cause a physical addiction like the opioids (in this case Vicodan, hydrocodone, or however you want to remember it). And I gotta tell you all, her psycological stregnth is SUBSTANTIAL, so thats an item I’m not really concerned with.

    Now, . Re:
    Jennifer at July 4, 2004 04:12 PM,
    Yodette at July 4, 2004 07:18 PM
    Amy at July 4, 2004 07:31 PM

  35. greg–
    now we understand that independent sparkle
    in your eyes…
    happy birthday…
    and what a gift you’ve received,

  36. Amy / Greg – tks for the updates, they’re beginning to put me off surgery at this point….but no pain, no gain I suppose and it’s obvious that Makenna is in a bucket load of pain right now – she’s lucky to have you guys.

    keep the updates coming….



  37. Greg,
    you are FAB-U-LOUS!

    Thanks for the updates on Makenna. You are a brave and kind bro! You obviously have a great love for your sister, and it shows.

    Maybe you have a new career? Rent-a-Bro!

    Need a Bro for a weekend event? Want someone who will fawn over you and make you feel like a Queen?
    Call Greg! He’s your man!

    Thanks again Greg for the updates, and taking care of our little munchkin!

    Lisa iMom

  38. Wooo hoooo !!! I’m glad she ate the ice cream !! I figured she was going to gripe about the apple sauce I got for her, but thought that Godiva Double Dutch chocolate ice cream might just make up for it ! ๐Ÿ™‚ Jen gets the props for setting me on the track that ‘kenna has a serious thing for chocolate !! ๐Ÿ™‚

  39. Happy Birthday to You !!!!!

    Happy Birthday to You !!!!!

    Happy Birthday to Greeeeeeggggggggg !!!!

    Happy Birthday to You !!!!! ๐Ÿ™‚

    (Sung in the style of The Bangles)

  40. 3:50 pm central
    thanks for the call.
    I’m back in the room, Makenna is still out (or faking it very well), & I’mm gonna have SOMETHING TO EAT!!!! OMG, Im’ drooling! bye!

    Amy, Jen says a big “hi” from back east, and with me , thanks for your help and support.
    Makenna & I really appreciate it!

  41. Happy Birthday Greg!

    Thanks for the updates.

    Hope M is a little more compliant now and a lot more comfortable.



  42. Makenna update:
    via Greg

    Dr. Z came at 1:45 p and took charge, and boy does he take charge. Tornado force 4.

    …in 5 minutes he took off all of the compression bandages, some of the bandages off the wounds (which were replaced, ie, wounds were redressed), packing out of the nose, …

    and removed the drain.
    (didn’t hurt her, but man, I nearly puked and cried at the same time. I’ll tell you, it’s one thing to see this on TV; another when it is up close & personal [like to yourself], but it is something ENTIRELY DIFFERENT when it being done to someone you love – in my case, like to a sister. whew.)

    We redid the bed, pj’s; Dr. Z. got on her case for being stubborn about not eating (“OK,OK,OK, alright!) & her just wanting it to be all over (tears, pissed-offedness, quelled by Dr Z. with a firm hand and more valium. I don’t think he took me seriously in an earlier phone call when I inferred she was REALLY uptight.)

    and AMY, she ate your ice cream! Yay!!!

    She’s back in a lighter compression bandage, spread out listening to country music on the radio (Alison Kraus and Union Station, last time I heard)

    Dr Z. praised her for doing well post-op, and I even got an “ataboy” for doing a good job too! Yay for us!

    BTW, if anyone wants to know, it’s my birthday today.

  43. Makenna update…

    thanks for the posts – we really appreciate them.

    Up at 7:30 – 4 HOURS of blessed sleep! She hurts like hell and wants the Dr. to come early and take off the compression dresings. After a drain change and some housekeeping (see above, 2:32 am), and some morning stuff (life’s little ignominities), I caLled the Dr. and relayed her request.


    …and for all the reasons I had argued with Makenna about
    (1) they are compression bandages designed to limit or reduce swelling, and she in quite prone to swelling
    (2) risk of infection,
    (3) they haven’t even been on 24 hrs, and
    (4) (most important to Makenna) their removal will not make her feel better.

    Most of her pain, if not discomfort, seems to be eminating from the chin down, where so much of the surgical work was done.

    She is still a little disoriented occasionally, though I think understandably. EIGHT separate proceedures were performed from her midneck to her forehead and back to her ears, and I suppose a little disorientation is warranted after that much damage (albeit in a good cause) has been done to your face.

    She’s not hang’n 10, but she’s hanging in –

    seems to be in hand – she’s back asleep – will try to get some myself –

  44. Thank you for the lyrical update Amy. It does sound like M is in great and loving hands of you and Greg.

    You are absolutely right when you wrote:
    “I’m so happy for and proud of her !

    You simply can’t help but be impressed, respect, and in awe of her. ๐Ÿ™‚

    What an amazing woman.”

    Get well soon Makenna.



    PS To Greg: My sympathy about the glasses. I’m the same way!

  45. They’re doing what can be done, making her less uncomfortable in small ways and being sure she doesn’t feel alone – the latter being more important than the former.

  46. there is a downside to being a patron saint
    –moments like this when i have to recognize
    and accept
    that there is very little i can actually
    for anyone…

  47. Wow. I guess you read a lot about how traumatic FFS is but it never really hits you until it’s someone close to you – you then see things in a completely different light. Luckily for Makenna, she’s got some fantastic post-operative helpers at hand.

    She’s in pretty good hands with you (Amy) and Greg


  48. ROFLMAO That’s really a good summary of what she’s like … every now and then … when you’d think she was in a comfortable sleep … you hear …

    WATER … well, more like WAARRGGTTTEERRR !!! ๐Ÿ™‚

    After which being satisfied,

    A few choice words follow !! lol

    And then … POOF …



    Out of the blue …

    Once again,

    You hear her exclaim …


  49. half-past one pm update —
    From Makenna’s Shaft, Greg.

    Makenna is sleeping SOUNDLY …snoring like a heiffer….

    WATER!!!! Greg has a water run to make for Makenna – be back in a few —

    She’s ok. I redid the nose again, moistened her eyes, gave her a drink (what she can handle), re-iced her eyes, vaselined her lips, straightened her up in bed, listen to her rant as well as she could…
    “This sucks.”
    “When can I get some pain medicine again?…that long??…..Fuck.”
    “I know I should go back to sleep. I’ll try. It’s all I can FUCKING DO!!!!
    “I’m not goin’ to a dance anytime soon….(gurgle)….”
    re-reasoned with her, and held her hand back to sleep.

    Amy was here all day with me, trying to help me find my way around this friggin PLACE to ANYWHERE that could fix my glasses — and then, in an act of desperation — get my eyes examined and get a new pair of glasses….before Makenna got back from the surgery…
    (I’m so blind wihout my specs I scare myself into a panic when they aren’t on my face or where they should be….I’d be USELESS to Makenna tonight and tomorrow until I at least got them fixed – so I should come all the way to Chicago to be USELESS? I don’t THINK so!)
    anyway, med – time is coming up soon…she’ll know it and will begin to fret … so I gotta go … more update later…


  50. Bless you Makenna, may you find your changes many times worth the discomfort and pain. I look forward to hearing about your recovery.
    Take Care, Aleta

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