Once a Smartass, Always …
So I go to my nephew’s last football game of the season late Saturday morning.
And despite winning most of their games this year, they found themselves suffering the fate many teams that go into a game confident their “name” alone will defeat the lesser known, farming-community team …
They got whipped !!
Not only was it only their second loss of the season, but they lost something like 54 – 18.
Those farmboys could play football.
Anyways … after the game, Bro and Sis-in-Law had to go to a meeting, Mom took nephews to a season ending football team party, and I was asked to take Dad back to their house as he was starting to feel worn down.
And I did of course. 🙂
The long walk from the parking lot to the football field, cold weather and slow game is not kind to anyone, let alone Dad with his health challenges.
So Dad and I get back to their place uneventfully,
And were just gabbing and laughing as we always do, discussing Michigan football, the Lions, the World Series, business opportunities, stocks …
Just the usual.
And then Dad asks me, totally seriously, but obviously wanting …
“Do you think you could figure out how to make some coffee for us, I could really use a cup of coffee to try and warm up.”
Dad was tired, I could tell. He wanted some coffee, something to warm the chill left over from the football game and one that the fire in the fireplace wasn’t conquering.
So I rise,
And as I’m heading to the kitchen say …
“Of course I can Dad, didn’t I mention it,”
I continue to say while entering the kitchen, raising my voice so he can hear from the distance,
“When they did all this stuff to my face, they also added the “Know How To Make Coffee” module to my brain. The “Worrying About the Size of My Ass” module is still on backorder though.”
I immediately hear some howling in the living room and quickly leave the kitchen to see what happened, worried Dad might be choking on something …
And find Dad laughing. Totally ROFLHAO.
“That’s good, really good. Funniest thing I’ve heard in a few weeks,” he says, with a chuckle. Then adds still smiling, “Of course, it’s been a slow few weeks.”
So when Mom returned home a few hours later, and while still snickering thinking about my one liner, Dad tells Mom what I said and I hear both mutually agree …
“Once a smartass, always a smartass.”
Damn straight ! 🙂
Oh yeah, and Dad said I made him a really good cup of coffee !!
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ooo, yodette,
you’re good!
i usually have one in my purse–
same principle…
I used to buy them because firends at work would bum them sometimes when they rane out. Since I always had an ample supply in my desk, they weren’t likely to wonder why I didn’t borrow them myself.
don’t feel bad–
i bought tampons
just so i could ride a bicycle…
Reminds me of old old joke:
Looking down at his bandaged hand Mr. Johnson asks his doctor:
“When I recover, will I be able to play the violin?”
“Oh yes, I’m sure you will.”
“Good! I’ve always wanted to play the violin!”
As a child I was confused by all the mixed messages. My parents said they sent me to school to become smart. But, my teachers warned again and again: “Don’t get smart with me!”
It was so confusing.
LOL Yeah … I know … it was an oldie, but goodie … and of course, I was pretty confident my audience hadn’t heard that joke before !! 🙂
And concerning my new nose making my ass look bigger … ROFLMBAO !!!
a good variation
on the demeaning classic…
seriously,
though,
i think it’s the estrogen that does it…
in the last few years,
i’ve noticed myself doing
little things the way my sisters did them;
and i never did them that way before,
and i didn’t think about it–
there wasn’t any,
“Oh, I’d better check my oil like a girl,
or the Texaco Attendant will clock me,
and the mechanics will beat me to death.”
it just happened…
and that new nose of yours,
aims–
i wasn’t going to say it,
but since you brought it up–
it really makes your ass look huge…