You are Being Read
No … I’m not talking about being “read” in the typical transsexual sense …
Where those like myself, who are attempting to just blend into society to casual and less acquiantances as nothing other than the girl they appear, are figured out, spotted, “read” by someone and identified as a transsexual, or misidentified in other ways.
No … I’m not talking about that at all.
I’m talking about how I’m reading YOU …
With YOU being the person who gives …
Lip service to understanding,
Lip service to tolerance, and
Lip service to support.
Your attempts at saying the right thing ring hollow.
I can tell by the lack of sincerity in your voice,
By the absence of eye contact, and
By the change in your attitude …
That you’re bothered by me,
Disgusted by me.
I can tell by your comments to others,
That you are hoping to find some concurring in your belief of the weirdness, bizarreness, and distastefulness.
Why can I read YOU?
It’s simple.
Because I have plenty of friends who have said the same thing as you …
But who mean it.
So I know what it sounds like when someone says it …
And doesn’t mean it.
You are being read.
I have read people exactly the same way, Amy. Never outright hostility to my face, never even low key disagreement. But rather a whole lot of “whatever makes you happy is all right with me”, when it actually isn’t. Sad, isn’t it?
Beth
To Yodette and Danielle, I’m very sorry to read you’ve had hostility from your families. Amy’s lucky to have such wise and open-minded parents as she has.
My own parents seem to be trying to pretend nothing is happening. I don’t know if that’s not worse than overt hostility in some ways. I only wish I had told them my feelings when I was younger – it’s hard to make them understand that I was only acting boy while longing to be girl.
hostility fron family–that was a biggie, yes…
and from the fundamentalist church i was in…
some gawkers…
About the only hostility I encountered was from my own family. Strangers were supportive or largely indifferent.
I can sorta, kinda understand your feelings Aims. That said, I think you have been very lucky so far, in some ways, in that you have not encountered any outright hostility. It’s the same for me, too. I cannot believe how positive people are being, but there are one or two who I suspect are a bit freaked out by what I’ve told them. Unfortunately, not everybody is going to be sweet and supportive – I’ll be thankful if the worst reaction I get were insincere acceptance. Sooner or later, though, somebody is going to get nasty – and I think that might happen to you, too. It goes with the territory 🙁 I hope it doesn’t happen to either of us, though, anyway.
Happy New Year to all the AmyNews.com community!
It takes a true master/pro, to identify the art of sucking! Props to you, Shaft!!
Sucking up, are we?
You (Hottie) !! … You know it’s not you who generated this post … none of The UnUsual Suspects or other Super Friends would ever do anything like was done to evoke this one !
Though for the record … Hottie can totally keep a secret … and has a great poker face such that you can’t even tell he’s keeping a secret.
Honest…I AM being sincere…as far as you know. In the future, I will do my best to improve my “sincerity” face…I promise!
this is one of the sharpest things you’ve written here, and is dead fucking on.
rockin’.
Opps … did I say that stuff out loud ?? 🙂 Wild the krap that I can spew out at times … huh? lol As usual, it was a stream of conscious post … I guess I just wanted to share it because … One, amazingly, this remains a pretty open dump of what I’m feeling at a given time, and that’s exactly what I was feeling … and two, even though my transition is grooving along nicely, I think it’s important to share the frustrations with the joys. In this particular sense, the hypocrisy to my face is just annoying, but the talking behind my back is what’s irritating.
Could I use this material? I’ve been there…but never put it into words like that…
Must have been a harsh experience to prompt this response Amy…sorry for you hon.
Makenna