More Krap That Only Happens To Me

I swear …

I must emit some aura that let’s guys know that I hate hockey and Nascar,

But for some reason still attracts them to me like moths to a light.

Anyways, the conversation below occurred a couple of weeks ago …

I’m just now having the courage to admit to it in public. 🙂

You’re beautiful.

You’ve been drinking for quite a while already, haven’t you?

No, I’m serious. I’ve been watching you … you’re beautiful.

Stalking me, huh ?? Well, I think that’s the alcohol talking, but thank you.

Today was my last day of work. I retired today.

Congratulations ! Do you have big plans for retirement?

Do you want to go to Daytona with me?


I’ve got a motor home and I’m going to go to as many Nascar events as I can next year. That’s all I’m going to do. And I’m looking for a pretty little blonde like you to go with me.

*blood started trinkling out of my ear*

In case you were wondering …

I declined.

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  1. I’m good with all of the football comments. But I gotta throw in my thoughts on Favre. The guy has a lot of baggage but he is a gamer. And I’m not a Packers fan.

  2. Tyler … I’m sorry if you took offense at any of the comments here … it’s always difficult to gauge the spirit in which things are sometimes posted, but I can promise you Shaft and Troop Leader meant nothing mean or judgmental in their comments … it’s just the way we spare with one another … sorry you got caught in some cross-fire … unfortunately we usually don’t stop the trash talking until someone gets hurt or we break something ! 🙂

    As far as your questions go …

    1.) It’s not the size of a guy’s motorhome that’s important, it’s the … no wait. I was wrong, size matters.

    2.) You know … I just don’t enjoy any motor sports … too long, noisey and all that gas and oil smells bad.

    3.) Age isn’t a bit issue for me … though I do tend to find myself attracted to men nearer my age than he was.

    4.) I can definitely be bought … but it’s not with cash or jewels !! 🙂

  3. I know a number of pilots who’ve transitioned, including a couple of combat jet-jocks, Vietnam and Gulf War, who are now quite nice looking women.

  4. Thanks for clearing this NASCAR thing up. I thought that it was just cars going round and round. But now I know that everyone who finds that sort of thing uninteresting is just…. WRONG.

    Such clarity of thought.

    I can imagine what fun someone with such laser focused certainty would be at a party:

    “I like this Chardonay”

    “Wrong! Me like beer”

    “Oh, isn’t the hostess wonderful?”

    “Wrong! Me no like hostess, except for twinkies”

    “Well, you seem to enjoy being here”

    “Wrong! Me only like hockey, football and NASCAR”

    “Well, OK then. So, I really like the Red Wings”

    “Wrong! Any team you like be no good”

    “Sorry, that my preferences don’t meet with your approval”

    “Wrong! apologies suck”

    Well then, Buh-Bye!

    (This is my last visit to this site. It has been amusing and entertaining. Best of luck to you all.)

  5. Amy, I wouldn’t call it a prank – more like a test. I’ve always suspected that you have a favorite NASCAR driver.

  6. Well, TL, I have pulled six G’s positive and five negative. As for speed, my typical cruise speed is 450 knots. I will hopefully be doing some mach one stuff in March. Come on over to Iraq and watch. My engines often make some pretty good vibrations too, but we try to balance out those turbines to keep them from doing that too much and flying apart.

    As for NASCAR not being MY cup of tea, that in no way means others shouldn’t enjoy the events. I actually participate in SCCA events, so I appreciate the technology, skills and risks associated with motorsports. Being in, or near a pack of racing cars on a course or even on the 405 freeway can be exciting.

    The question that remains unanswered is whether Amy would have said yes if:

    A. The Motorhome was bigger
    B. The race was Formula One
    C. The guy wasn’t so old
    D. An offer of cash or jewels accompanied the invitation.

    What say you, Miss Amy?

  7. I am proud to admit that I am one of those Billy-Bob NASCAR girls. And to those of you who just “don’t get NASCAR” I challenge you to actually attend a race, hear the engines, and feel the excitment of the fans. Tyler, have you ever gone 180+ mph and felt G-forces that push you up against your seat so you can’t move? If not, you should really try it sometime — it is so much fun!!

    The topic of racing has always been a sore subject between me and Amy — and I’ve know her many years (even before Amy was Amy). Amy told me this story a while ago and I only wish I could have been there to see the look on her face. I would have been ROFLMAO along with Shaft. I’m sure she only posted this to get a comment/rise out of me. Looks like it worked. Love ya too AmyWan!!

  8. I never have gotten NASCAR. Really, after you see the first lap, it is an awful lot like summer re-runs.

    The networks could loop the first lap over and over and just dub in old commentary. Then NASCAR could run just the final lap. They could save a ton of money. The fans would never know the difference.

    Besides, those drivers don’t drive any different than most of the folks I used to commute into L.A. with on the 405 freeway. In fact, we commuters had it tougher. We would go as fast as we could, door to door through the curves. Every once in a while, someone would blow an engine and slow everyone else down. Other times, drivers would try to pass on the grassy infield area and spin out or flip over. But the part that really made the L.A. commuter races tougher than NASCAR were the pit stops. Not only do L.A. commuters have to make it to the pits by cutting across six lanes of fiercely aggressive AND ARMED, drivers, once you stop for gas, just like NASCAR, four guys run out and they jack up your car. But these guys are illegals from the local barrio and they take your tires and run away. I would like to see Billy-Bob Nascar-guy deal with that!

  9. I would have at least asked what kind of motor home it was. If he had one of them big ass Marathon Prevosts, I wouldn’t have cared WHERE he wanted to take me…

  10. Well … I think the whole “survival of the fitness” weeding out process hasn’t worked in that sense yet because I’m pretty certain … that line probably would have interested 1/2 the other single girls there at the time !! 🙂

    Me … I’m picky … I’m holding out for a Mr. Roadtrip that suggests a season long tour of NFL games or making every Michigan home-away game for a season … though if anyone is wondering, Men’s NCAA Basketball Tournament games, I don’t care what game, has a certain appeal to me also !! 🙂

  11. Only one word sums ‘Mr. you’re blonde, beautiful and obviously thick as a brick’ PUTKNOCKER!!!!!! How has the human race managed to evade extinction with this missing link….I dunno, I’d prolly have given him a knee in the Knutts!!!!

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