New Kid In The Pool Hall

So …

Though I already had hooked myself up with a Havana night dancing class on Thursday or Monday, depending on if I can find a man in the course of 2 days,

I thought I’d also check out seeing if I could get on a sub list for another bowling league for something to do during the fall/winter months.

A sub list I thought might do the trick,

Since I really didn’t want to commit to playing with a new team,

As I would be the odd chica out and might not like others on the team.

Plus since it wasn’t a commitment,

I could do it whenever I felt like it if the opportunity arose.

So Sunday afternoon I made the rounds at some bowling alleys in the area.

However, pretty much each alley I stopped at really wanted to place me on a team instead of letting me be a floating sub.

I even stopped at my old alley to try my luck …

Though honestly,

It was more just to see if I had the balls 😉 to even go in there and inquire.

Which I did,

Tendering my standard …

I just moved here and really don’t know anyone, so there’s no way I could get a team together. I’m really not a good bowler, but I do know how to drink beer and I can be fun on occasion. Do you keep any sub lists for your leagues that could use someone like me?” line.

Again … I didn’t have any luck as he was more interested in trying to get me to sign on as a permanent member of a team.

Though he did spend more than a decent amount of time with me going through the list of all the leagues and telling me which ones he thought I’d find fun.

And I did smirk when I asked him about costs and he said he wasn’t sure what the sanction fees were for women.

Anyways, after leaving there …

I noticed this pool hall around the corner was “Forming Fall Leagues”.

Hmmm …

Why not?

Singer had subbed in a pool league this past summer from time to time and said it was fun,

I’m assuming you can drink and play pool at the same time, which is sort of a requirement for a league to hold my interest (bowling, golf … do you see the trend?), and …

Heck, it’s not a demanding physical activity, so it really shouldn’t matter if you’re a boy or a girl, mixed teams should be fine (and I am the epitome of mixed right now 🙂 !)

So I pulled into the parking lot and went to find out the scoop on pool leagues.

Now two steps into this particular location …

I immediately noticed the following:

1.) It wasn’t smoky at all which suprised me;

2.) It was much cleaner than I expected it to be;

3.) The place was much bigger than I imagined, there were a lot of pool tables;

4.) There were many more people in there than I thought there was going to be at that time based on the number of cars in the parking lot;

5.) Of all the people there at the time, they were all men; and,

6.) In addition to playing pool, apparently all the men there participate in the sport of synchronized rubber necking, as it felt like approximately 40 heads turned and looked at me in complete unison.

Yikes …

I picked a bad day to stop wearing a bra !! 🙂

So this is what it feels like to be the meat in a meat market.

It was at this point something really strange happened.

A circular beam of light shot down from immediately over me,

And this brighter beam of light that looked like a neon ring appeared and scanned me …

From head to toe,

And back.

Then I heard this sort of mechanical processing movement from above,

Followed by a mechanical arm dropping from the ceiling,

And slapping what appeared to be a UPC label across the front of my chest.

After the light turned off,

I looked down,

And read upside down the following:

Premium Piece of Ass.

Expensive, But Well Worth It.

Well, I really can’t argue with that.

So I left it on and approached the counter to talk to the guy working,

And tossed out a slightly modified version of my New Kid In Town line …

I just moved here and really don’t know anyone, so there’s no way I could get a team together. But I was wondering, do you keep any sub lists for any of your leagues?

Depends, do you have any experience?” The dude asked with an arrogant sort to attitude that I found condescending.

Are we still talking about pool?” I tossed right back, laced with heavy whatever undertones.

Note to Self: It would still be a wise idea, that in the future, think twice before saying krap like that in settings when you’re outnumbered 40 – 1.

Anyways, I did get a smirk out of him with my response and he informed me that I should talk with the hall’s manager during the week. Unfortunately, he added, if I had experience in league play, I’d probably be able to find something rather quickly, but if I didn’t, it might be more difficult there.

Oh well.

Overall, my trips around town really didn’t prove too productive …

But hey, it was something to do late on a Sunday afternoon !

And I still think my sub list idea might work …

Maybe later in the season when they given up getting a permanent commitment from people.

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  1. Amy,
    Sorry, There is not a White Castle or a Krystal in Texas, go figure.They have Pizza Hut, but the two that are close to where I drive have a Hooters within walking distance of them.:)

  2. Amy,
    What you need up there is this place that is here in D/FW called “Main Event”. It has a full bowling alley (bumpers are optional for those who keep throwing those gutter balls), plenty of pool tables, video games (lots of racing games to practice your driving skills) and laser tag where you can practice those “Halo” combat skills on those who pissed you off earlier in the night.:)

  3. Aww…I know everyone means well. Its an unusual situation that the unusual suspects find themselves in and I’m sure they ARE great peeps…truly good people.

    If it was me (that is if I were a US) I would prob have some concerns about it, but only for the next few bowling nights. Its not like Amy is a child molester or murderer or an attorney …er wait…she IS an attorney…woops…

    This stuff does fade away very quickly, if the spotlight is redirected at bowling or drinking or kareoke.


  4. I’ll try to take Laura’s comment with Amy’s spin. However, anyone who thinks the US have been anything but totally stand-up is just plain wrong. I am certain that Amy’s absence from the bowling team is as difficult for them as it is for Amy.

  5. Ahem … ahhh Hottie, I think if we’re going to get technical about it … in the past we were quite often referred to as “insensitive” a-holes … along with “loud and obnoxious” a-holes, “drunk” a-holes and my personal favorite “what a bunch of phucking” a-holes. 🙂

    I think Laura’s comment was offered more to help me feel better by conveying that not having me around would have to be an experience anyone would miss :), not to imply anyone was being insensitive.

    Though if I haven’t made it clear to everyone … it was a very difficult situation and Hottie, Singer, Sister and Miss Daisy have all been incredibly understanding, sensitive and supportive friends at all times that I needed such. I wish everyone could have such great friends that I have, but I’m sorry, I’m just not going to share them !! 🙂

  6. Thanks for your input L…I guess we are just a bunch of insensitive a-holes, being that it is a pretty simple situation to deal with.

  7. Naw … it’s not the bowling or the golfing that I miss … it’s the hanging out regularly with my really great friends that I’m a’missin’ greatly !! 🙂

    I think that Singer, Hottie, Sister and Miss Daisy all wish we could hang together still. And as I said … they never said I couldn’t bowl, it was just that to a person, they have been so understanding and supportive, it became clear to me when I sensed some of them were going to be uncomfortable with others’ reactions, I needed to think of them and give them their one night of fun in a setting that wasn’t going to create any uncomfortability for them.

    I hold each of them dear and will always be there whenever they need me, just as they have for me ! 🙂

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