Scam Artist
So Indiana Jones Lando Calrissian has a totally new scam he is pulling on me.
You see, Indy is an exceptionally smart dog,
Always has been.
And the fact that he is so old,
Means that in addition to having a vast reserve of dog wisdom,
He also has reached the age where he’s pretty much uninhibited about trying anything.
I suppose he figures that if I challenge him on something,
He’ll just blame it on his age and alleged fading memory. 🙂
His first scam was the “I have to go potty again” scheme.
You see, despite the fact that he can easily go a full 10 hours without having to go to the bathroom when I’m not home,
Whenever I am home …
He has to go once an hour.
Meaning,
Once an hour,
He scams himself a Scooby Snack that I give him whenever he comes back into the house.
Well, this morning …
He refined his act.
I let him out …
And left the slider door open so he could come back in when he felt like it.
A few minutes later, I see him as he meanders in and heads straight to the kitchen for his Scooby Snack.
I shut the sliding door and then gave him his Scooby Snack.
At which point,
He immediately turned around and walked over to the sliding door and barked to be let out.
I was like …
“What do you think you’re doing Indy?”
Anyways, I let him out and watched to see what he was plotting.
Well …
He went to the bathroom again,
This time No. 2.
After which,
He meandered in, walking right past me as I stood at the sliding door watching, and headed straight to the kitchen for his Scooby Snack.
Which, of course, I gave him.
I swear,
As he turned to walk away and enjoy his second Scooby Snack in less than 3 minutes …
He had a smirk on his face ! 🙂
Hi. This is my links.
Greg I agree…..she ain’t dumb….but she ain’t all that smart either, then again, she’s wealthy, has her own TV show & lots of advisors..so I guess she’s doing something right.
There’s hope for the rest of us. That’s it, I’m going blonde, getting boobs twice as big as her IQ and I’m gonna act as dumb as ditch water….she gives a bad name to blonde, well endowed female astro physicists thought doesn’t she…
clio-
The Anna Nicole you know is from the Anna Nichole show – yup, dumb as dirt, 100% rich bitch, helpless without advise, of no earthly use to anyone except as a source of income to her entorage and as an occasional male receptical.
That having been said, she now has what she said LONG AGO was what she wanted – i.e., lots of money, fame, and continued good looks. She was smart enough to look and act dumb when she needed to; smart enough to hire the smartest people that could be bought to help her get what she wanted, and smart enough to follow their advice.
I don’t think she’s that dumb. SHALLOW, perhaps; not much of a partner; self centered to a grevious fault, but not dumb.
LOL Too funny … all of you !!! 🙂
indy can’t be a boarder collie–
he’s not paying rent…
so, basically,
he comes in the house,
gets his snack,
and says,
“I left my business card outside
under there.”
🙂
Okay Amy – here’s my take.
Fact:
Indy is a collie….
Border Collies are the smartest dogs in the world (strictly speaking, Indy is not a border collie; however, does belong to the collie family and therefore by association and breed is a smart dog)…..
Indy lives with a Lawyer, a female Lawyer at that and as studies have shown, Lawyers are a pretty smart group of professionals (I’ve attached a reference to material that supports this statement)
8/17/2002 paper: “Meritocracy, Cognitive Ability, and the Sources of Occupational Success” by Robert M. Hauser, Department of Sociology, University of Wisconsin-Madison.
Indy has been around for a while…..he has learned much, experienced much of what life has to offer him….
Indy knows he will get a treat after he uses natures bathroom (the world is a man’s toilet – extents to the male of all species…)
Fact:
Amy has had a boob job and prolly appears a little different to Indy.
Supposition:
It is fair to say that Indy knows he will get a Scooby snack following a visit to the local flower bush (he knows this because this is what he was taught by you) – it is also fair to say Counselor, that you have, at no point, actually told Indy that he is allowed a maximum of 1 Scooby snack during a bio break, even if Indy decides to split a bio break so that, his Number 1 and Number 2 are not conducted at exactly the same time but are conducted in quick succession (as witnessed earlier today). It would be fair to say Counselor, that you failed to qualify the terms of the ‘doggie reward for taking a bio break scheme’, it was not made clear that there was a minimum time of 1 hour between bio breaks and Scooby Snacks and as a result you are in no position to change the terms of the current agreement without causing undue stress to Indy. It might be prudent Counselor, if in future you state categorically what the terms of any reward scheme for bio break might be, thus leaving no room for interpretation and as a result would obviate the need for arbitration to resolve any dispute that may or may not arise as a result of unclear terms of agreement.
Of course……………
Indy might really have needed to use the loo in quick succession….maybe.
Or
Indy has been watching waaaaay too much of the Anna Nicole Show whilst you were away in hospital recovering from your boob job and has concluded that because you are blonde (like Anna Nicole) and now have big boobs (like Anna Nicole) that you must be a dumb as ditchwater – just like Anna Nicole (which of course we know you aren’t) – perhaps you need to have a face to face with Indy to hash out an addendum to the original ‘Scooby Snack for using the Jax’ reward scheme….
Well, there you have it…..verbose but that’s me….short answer for everything as they say…..you’ve obviously got a very smart dog there Amy, very smart indeed.
cl
It looks like Indy is doing a good job training you
“Indiana Jones… I always knew someday you’d come walking back through my door.” -Marion
-from “Raiders of the Lost Ark” (1981)
If only Indy had a ‘great’ hat…a bullwhip…
…and ‘theme music’…
🙂
delia
Padwan to a pooch?
🙂