Movie Review – The Lord of The Rings: The Return of the King

(aka “It’s a Great Movie, So This Really Isn’t A Movie Review, But A Summary of What I Did New Year’s Eve 2003“)

Let’s not belabor why I didn’t have any plans on New Year’s Eve … if you’re wondering, just read this and this …

Instead let’s focus on the phact that at about 5:30 pm on December 31, 2003 … I decided to go see The Lord of The Rings: The Return of the King as my New Year’s Eve entertainment.

Upon arriving at the theatre for the 7:00 pm showing, I was pleased to find that tickets to the show were still available … Yay !! Things were looking up !! 🙂 … As that had not been the case the last two times I tried to see the flick.

Unfortunately, the line for the concessions was painfully long and slow. And the dude in front of me who found a way to place a single order involving popcorn, nachos, drinks, candy and hot dogs which required that the poor girl behind the counter spend darn near 10 minutes assembling his New Year’s Eve dinner, got on my nerves tremendously !! And then after waiting for Mr. I’ll Have One of Everyting … to my ultimate dismay, I found out the Frozen Mountain Dew machine was broken !! Seriously !! I wanted to cry !! I had popcorn, sure … but no Frozen Mountain Dew ?? This was not good !!

Anyways … I made my way to the theatre and surprisingly found a fairly decent seat in the rather packed setting … aisle seat, a few rows away from the middle entry to the theatre … I removed by coat and sat myself down.

That’s when I heard the whispers …

“Pssst … look.”

Hmmm, that’s strange … I suppose I could be being read … but I guess I’m just getting used to not being read … sorta losing my sense for it I suppose … because that doesn’t sound like I’m being read.

“Yeah.”

And then some stiffled laughter.

Hmmmm … I kinda wanted to look, but then I didn’t want to look … what the … ???

Fortunately, my confusion was quickly clarified … as I heard a couple of younger sounding giggles and a bit of movement just up and to the right behind me …

I was in a theatre with stadium seating, but in a row where the row right behind me was a bit higher than normal … so in reality, I suppose it was like they were almost above me …

Then suddenly, I heard the words “Go, go, go” … and some more laughter.

A few seconds later I saw a rather young boy … I’d put in the 11 – 12 year old range … walk down the aisle past me … and out the door …

A short bit later … said youngster walks back into the theatre … and I was watching him … trust me … I was watching him.

And that’s when I realized what the whispers were all about …

As it turned out … that particular young man, and what I counted to be his two friends, apparently had a fine appreciation for rather realistic looking fake boobs … his eyes were zeroed in on mine and didn’t leave them as he walked right past me … I heard their whispers upon his return … and got to enjoy their attention on a few more of their trips in and out of the theatre during the movie … so, I’ve got that going for me. 🙂

As far as the movie goes, it was visually stunning, a fun view, a nice conclusion to the trilogy and very, very long … I think it’s official play time is 10 hours 42 minutes and 18 seconds … and there aren’t any intermissions. So go to the bathroom before the movie starts. I definitely enjoyed the movie and consider it a theatre showing must see … as I have the first two movies in the trilogy. I have never read the books on which the movie was based, but understand that the last 45 or so minutes of the movie was spent wrapping things up to remain true to the books. Honestly, I could have done without that consistency with the book, but I enjoyed the movie anyways. I give it a 7 out of 10.

Once the movie finally ended at about 10:30 pm, I stood up and ssssllloooowwwwlly put my coat back on … of course, only after stretching my back first … Happy New Year boys !! 🙂

I then went over to Ex and Morrie’s place to say Happy New Year to them and scam a free beer … hanging out there for about an hour or so.

Afterwards … I decided … I needed food !!! Having not eaten the entire day, except for the movie popcorn sans Frozen Mountain Dew and a smoothie at the mwall earlier in the day. So while aimlessly driving around, I found a Burger King that appeared to be open for business, drove up to the drive thru and started to place my order …

“I’d like two Whoppers, ….”

crack, hiss, crackle

“I’m sorry, we’re out of Whopper buns, we won’t have any more for another 30 minutes, we getting some from another location.”

“Wow … at the home of the Whopper, you can’t sell me a Whopper??”

hiss, crackle, hiss

“I’m sorry, not right now, would you like something else?”

“A large orange drink … no, just kidding, I really have my heart set on a Whopper, I’ll have to fulfill my destiny elsewhere, thanks though, Happy New Year !! 🙂”

crackle, crackle, crackle

I then tried another Burger King, as the Taco Bell, Wendy’s, KFC, and McD’s were all closed that I passed along the way … and unfortunately … so was the Burger King …

Hmmmm …. I needed food … and I was not about to be denied …

So I ventured further downtown to try a Burger King I figured would be open …

And found success !!!

So I pulled into the drive thru lane and placed my order …

“May I have …. Two Whoppers, no ketchup … a Big Fish … and a Large Fry.”

I then proceeded to the drive thru window … which the drive thru dude opened while on the telephone …

And he was counting down …

Eight … Seven … Six …

I checked the clock in my car … it said 11:58 … hey … it must be almost midnight … and my car clock must be a bit slow !!

Five … Four … Three … Two … One !!!

Yes, I know … it’s pathetic … as the New Year’s ball was dropping … where was I?

Being lonely girl in the drive thru at a Burger King …

Whatever.

I was still smiling … mainly because I was about to get food !! 😉

Then as the drive thru dude finished the count down … in unison … I joined him in a … HAPPY NEW YEAR !!!!!!! 🙂

And that’s when the Late Night Burger King Manager Lady saw me and said …

“The first drive thru customer of 2004 … give the lady her order for free !!”

“Woo hoo !! Thank you and Happy New Year to you !!!! I love free food !!”

“Then give her some ice cream desserts too !!!”

Sa-weet !!!

By this time, since I was downtown and really did not want to be alone … I drove to the vicinity of the bar where I thought Miss Daisy might be hanging. Unfortunately, a decent parking space was not to be found … and the one I eventually found was located where I was just not comfortable walking from alone … and then I wisely concluded … I shouldn’t cockblock Miss Daisy twice in less than a week … so I figured I had best just make my way home, consume my free food … and let MD get some actioooon.

Which is exactly what I did.

And then at a bit after 1:00 am …

My mobile phone went off … which really wasn’t a surprise … it was New Year’s Eve after all … I just figured it was someone who thought they needed an attorney at 1:00 am … it happens.

So I grabbed my phone … to check the page … and see from which of my services it came …

But it wasn’t a work page.

It was a four word text message from Hottie …

Happy New Year Amy!

I think it’s going to be ! 🙂

Epilogue: First of all … wasn’t that just the sweetest gesture in the world for Hottie to do with the Happy New Year’s text message ?? Wow !! So the following morning while pouring myself a cup of coffee, I decided to check my home voice mail messages … something I do about once a week or two … I had 48 messages … half of them were hang-ups, a couple were legitimate calls, the balance were telemarketing calls … except for the last 5 messages on my answering machine … which were all from a rather intoxicated woman … with whom I previously had plans with on NYE before cancelling them … in case you’re wondering, you can rest assured they weren’t nearly as nice as the New Year’s message I got from Hottie !! 🙂