Worthless Salutations

“Hi, how are you? ”

“Hey, how ya doin?”

So many times that is asked … as sort of a hello … not meant to generate a real answer … it’s filler talk … it means nothing, not asked with sincerity and not expected to be answered with honesty. I never ask it in that way, if I ask, I’m concerned and want a sincere answer.

“Good, you?”

“Good thanks.”

The senior partner at my old law firm always answered the questioned the same way … Never Had It So Good … he was a positive, optimistic person. 🙂

Myself … I usually do the courteous …

“Fine thanks, you?”

But sometimes, I can’t bring myself to perpetuate even that simple lie …

I don’t tell them the truth for gawd’s sake … that’s not socially appropriate … no one cares how you’re doing and no one wants to find out …

No … I do a redirect …

I simply don’t answer the question …

I’ll smile, maybe toss in a sort of laugh and head nod up and down, and then say …

“How are you?”

They’ll do their courtesy … “Fine thanks” …

And we’re done doing the salutation dance.

And I didn’t have to lie.

I’ve done this for most of my life, at least as far back as I have been asked that question …

And to this date …

Only one person has ever caught on to this tactic of mine.

They’ll usually press me for an answer then, because they know what it means.

Now if Mom, Dad or Shaft ask me that question, I don’t play that game. I answer them honestly. Everyone else, I’ll do a redirect.

Why do I mention that ??

Mainly ’cause I’ve been asked that phrickin’ question often the last few weeks, and regardless of my phunk … I still answered …

“Fine thanks, you?”

There’s really no need for me to answer any other way.

Because there was nothing they could have done to get me outta my phunk.

Why?

I don’t think I know how to ask for or accept people’s help.

It’s pretty much a running joke in my circle of friends …

I’m either called doormat (mat for short) or bitch.

Ask me for anything and I’ll try really hard to deliver, and usually do …

But usually it’s a one way street … I simply don’t ask for things in return.

Of my friends, I ask more of Shaft than I ask of anyone in the world, and I suspect even he’ll admit, I’m pretty much a low maintenance friend (probably the lowest maintenance transsexual friend that he has !! lol 🙂 ).

This phunk that I had been under the past few weeks … it was scary.

And I would have benefited from having some assistance from friends, it would have been a good thing … but not only did I not know how to ask for help … I couldn’t even accept it when it was offered by some of you (thank you though 🙂 ).

I’m unphunked now … I’ve worked my way outta it … and back to my chipper self … and I have a few posts that I’ve keyed out while I was working my way out of it that I hope you’ll find entertaining when posted … or at least informative.

But I think I need to learn how to not only say “help”,

But also how to accept it.

I consider it a character flaw of mine.

One I suspect that was the result of my coping techniques.