Is The Door Locked?
Shaft and I were walking to the parking garage earlier this week …
It was around 7:00 p.m.
Eastern Standard Time.
Cold and dark.
We were gabbing about something … laughing … I think we were mocking ourselves about something at the time.
But when we got off level 9 of the parking garage …
Out of the blue, he affirmatively tells me …
“I’m running the meeting on Thursday.”
“Why?”
“I’m running the meeting on Thursday.”
“What? Do you think OBP and I’ll get into it or something? You don’t think I can run the meeting?”
“I’m just saying … I’m running the meeting.”
We got in his car and he drove me down the ramp to level 4 where my car was parked.
Sensing my new mood … Shaft says as I’m closing the door,
“Hey, it’s still your firm.”
We’ve been trying to get Shaft, Spuddy, OBP and me together for a few weeks now … to discuss and decide what’s going to be the future of things at firm … my involvement, delegation of duties, delegation of financial responsibilities, firm name … those sorta things. We agreed to make it happen on Thursday afternoon.
And I’ve been thinking a great deal about what my future involvement at the firm will be ever since walking to the parking garage with Shaft and having that conversation.
Now it has nothing to do with him “running the meeting?” Though usually I’m accustomed to being the one running meetings, there are meetings where he has run in the past … that he has controlled.
But we’ve always talked about it beforehand … “Do you think I should run it?” or “Do you think you should run it?” ….
Never the affirmative definitive … “I’m going to run it.”
The tone in his voice … authority, decisiveness, certainty … conveyed that he was taking control of the firm …
And that made me very happy … he had taken the reins and was running with it.
They definitely needed it … I’ve been distracted lately and wasn’t getting things done that needed to get done.
In reality, it’s never been “my” firm … it’s always been a collective … first Shaft and me, then Shaft, OBP and me, and finally Shaft, OBP, Spuddy and me … but a lot of the formation work, start up efforts in the early years were mine, I put a lot of sweat into it …
And over the years they’ve all deferred to me and let me run with, make … pretty much any decision I wanted to make.
Pretend that I was in charge … that it was my firm.
But clearly,
My time has now passed.
And I miss it already.
Thanks for the thoughts, all. It’s kind of funny when you think about it. Amy obviously has thought through and planned for the transition as much as possible and still faces many unknowns that aren’t listed in the instruction manual. You get my point. I don’t have an instruction manual, either. So I use my best judgment and hope that I don’t mess things up too bad. Taking Yodette’s comment a step further, I think we all muddle through and hope for a great result.
Shaft, she’s lucky to have a co-worker and friened like you. Transition certainly laughs at even the best laid plans – wish someone was kicking my ass to move on further instead of having to kick it myself…I’ve damn near dislocated my hip and still not landed that killer blow!
So, stepping in much further…..
I totally understand that you are not being forced out…..
So, with that said, quality employment (defined as intellectually challenging, financally rewarding, and a supportive environment) for bright and gifted woman is a very difficult thing to find.
Shaft, “kick” her away, but please attach a bungee cord……..
incredible, but true–
there ARE times when i’m glad
i don’t know what to say…
The transition to full-time is grasping the nettle, no doubt about it. It’s a time when best laid plans turn to “muddle through” time. Amy has to muddle through it.
Remember to keep things in perspective. It is important to help Amy help herself under these circumstances. Any agenda is, or will be, one that Amy sets for herself and for us. As her friends, our job is to make sure the agenda is followed. If Amy decides that she wants to stay full-time, it would make all of our lives much more simple. But I don’t think that’s what she wants. If Amy decides to pursue a dual career track, we will support her toward that goal, as well. However, it is clear that we, as her friends and business partners, need to take the weight of the the day-to-day administration of the office off of her shoulders, if she chooses to puruse the dual career track. I think I can honestly say that I have known Amy as long or longer than most readers. I sense that Amy is in pain. On one hand, the idea of a changed role at the firm is an emotional concept. On the other hand, I think she is suffering through an inability to move forward with the transition in as timely a fashion as she would like. I wouldn’t be a friend if I didn’t take affirmative steps to help her move forward. A little kick in the ass, if you will. Anyone who has followed the website for long knows that I have always advocated for the “stay here” option. But how can I ignore what Amy thinks is best for her? Do I force my will upon her, or respect her judgment and do my best to help her succeed at her chosen course of action? My job is to make sure that she knows that she is wanted here, and to support her if she decides not to stay.
Hi Joanna ! 🙂 Thanks for breaking your silence and commenting !! 🙂
You’ve raised a good point … and one that I need to clarify …
It’s not like Shaft, OBP or Spuddy are forcing me out … taking it over … or anything like that …
If anything … it’s more like I’m benching myself … taking myself out of the game for a while.
And the reality is … I can’t just be placed on injured reserve … I actually have to be cut from the team.
That’s not saying I can’t be re-signed in the future.
I honestly feel that Shaft, OBP and Spuddy would all like me to stay around for the duration …
But once gone … we all know the likelihood or returning is slim …
We’ve all said “we’ll keep in touch” or “we’re always going to be best friends” to someone that we’ve now gone years without even thinking about.
And that knowing that will likely happen here causes me a bit of morose.
Amy…. I have been a silent, but long time reader…..
It’s still your firm. Fight for it!