• Changed the colors of
• Changed the colors of my webpage ….. I’m sure I missed a few things …… it now seems to be a bit too bright to me …. let me know what you think ….. I am at somewhat of a disadvantage …… colorblind here .. just red/green/brown …… but it does require me to rely on the kindness of strangers to tell me when I’m completely color-whacked !! 🙂
• Lions are going to get their butt kicked today ….
• Went to a holiday party last night …… it’s been amusing to me lately …… how common it is now for people whom I haven’t seen in quite a while …….. don’t even recognize me …… wait until next year LOL
• I’m developing a plan for a transition to part-time ….. instead of going 24/7 right away …… I’m thinking of going 24/3 first
• My big problem is that I really don’t go out and about much as Amy …. considering my limited excursions ….. I actually pass very well …… but I just need to start going out more period ….. just like with the voice ….. just like with make-up ….. just like with everything ….. it’s practice, practice, practice …… I just have to practice my outs and abouts more …….
• There’s so much about playing the male role, playing the role I have for the last 30-something years …. that I am going to miss …… this causes me to constantly second guess myself ….. maybe I can just stick it out …… it’s “not” that bad …… but you know what makes sticking it out really hard? ……… when I’m playing my male role ……. I’m constantly aware of my gender conflict …. it’s there, in the background, sort of like the neverending concern and distraction one has sometimes if they can’t remember if they unplugged the iron or turned off the stove before they left on vacation ….. does it cause me to physically hurt ?? nope, nada, no ….. but it distracts me terribly …. and it completely interferes with my opportunity to live a life ….. a life that would be bound to have sadness, disappointment, despair, anger, happiness, and glee intermersed throughout ….. but a life that I would live ……. and you know what?? ….. when I’m not playing the male role …. when I’m being me ……. that distraction is gone ….. I get mad, I get happy, I dance, I cry, I laugh, I yell …… I live ……. but …….. there’s so much about playing the male role, playing the role I have for the last 30-something years …. that I am going to miss …… this causes me to constantly second guess myself …… rinse and repeat ……
