I didn’t make any New Year’s resolutions this year …<\/p>\n
I mean,<\/p>\n
I figured after all of you shot down my plan last year to take up social smoking …<\/p>\n
You’d pretty much shoot down any of the ideas I was thinking of this year too !! \ud83d\ude42<\/p>\n
However, <\/p>\n
Not to be deterred from moving onward and forward …<\/p>\n
I’m ready to move on to the next item on my Life To-Do List.<\/p>\n
Let’s see …<\/p>\n
Where was I on that list?<\/p>\n
.
.
.
.<\/p>\n
Do a stand-up comedy routine at open mic night.<\/em><\/p>\n Yes you poor souls …<\/p>\n It’s time for me to take the stage again !!!<\/p>\n Heh, and you thought I sucked at kareoke !! <\/p>\n Wait until you hear this !! \ud83d\ude42<\/p>\n I’ve found the venue,<\/p>\n Got the target date,<\/p>\n And have a horribly pathetic 10 minutes of material …<\/p>\n Which is a good 9 1\/2 minutes longer than I actually need.<\/p>\n I figure I’m all set.<\/p>\n Now as far as my routine goes …<\/p>\n I don’t make reference to having a sex change in my bit …<\/p>\n It’s just pretty much typical Amy-wan fare:<\/p>\n One part self-mocking;<\/p>\n One part topical reference with some pop culture flavoring; and,<\/p>\n One part "did that sweet lil’ thang actually just say that?<\/em>"<\/p>\n I’m so going to die on stage …<\/p>\n I can’t wait !!!!!! \ud83d\ude42<\/p>\n If I suck really bad,<\/p>\n I’ll post an mp3 of the trainwreck.<\/p>\n Though if I don’t suck …<\/p>\n Well,<\/p>\n I’ll post an mp3 of that too,<\/p>\n ‘Cause I know you won’t believe it otherwise !! \ud83d\ude42<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" I didn’t make any New Year’s resolutions this year … I mean, I figured after all of you shot down my plan last year to take up social smoking … You’d pretty much shoot down any of the ideas I was thinking of this year too !! \ud83d\ude42 However, Not to be deterred from moving…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[139],"tags":[],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":139,"label":"General"}]},"featured_image_src_large":false,"author_info":{"display_name":"Amy","author_link":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/author\/amy\/"},"comment_info":6,"category_info":[{"term_id":139,"name":"General","slug":"general","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":143,"taxonomy":"category","description":"","parent":0,"count":775,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":139,"category_count":775,"category_description":"","cat_name":"General","category_nicename":"general","category_parent":0}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3428"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3428"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3428\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3428"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3428"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3428"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}Jump out of an airplane.<\/del><\/p>\nFix that little gender mishap leftover from birth.<\/del><\/p>\n