I’m really struggling with something to journal today …..<\/p>\n
That’s odd.<\/p>\n
Because I have a lot to write about …. so it’s not a dearth of topics …… in fact, I need to write about one event in particular ….. cause I’m curious to evaluate my feelings in a couple of situations.<\/p>\n
In a completely professional setting, I met a t-girl.
\n
\nI don’t think she suspected I could tell ….<\/p>\n
But who knows ……<\/p>\n
I’m sure she’s as skilled at deception as I …..<\/p>\n
But I couldn’t get it outta my head that I could tell, her being t didn’t bother me at all ….<\/p>\n
But me being able to tell did.<\/p>\n
It made me uncomfortable about myself being in that same position someday …..<\/p>\n
Huh ?<\/p>\n
What I mean is that for all appearances ….. she appeared as any other 50+ woman ….<\/p>\n
Very passable<\/i> – I know I’m the only one in the limited setting that noticed.<\/p>\n
Very nice<\/i> – she presented herself as a sweet, intelligent lady.<\/p>\n
But I could tell ….. she was passing, but I could tell.<\/p>\n
And this was the first time I had ever met her.<\/p>\n
Which kinda, sorta, mighta throw a bit of a wrench into my twist on the whole gender imprinting theory that I have incorporated into the Decision episodes …… and how I would implement a transition if I chose Option 1.<\/p>\n
What were the tells ?? Well …<\/p>\n
It certainly was not appearance …. she was shorter than I ….. physically fit ……<\/p>\n
I’d guess she’s had ffs …. if not, then ….. “Beeaaatch” \ud83d\ude42 ……. cause her face was non-telling …..<\/p>\n
No …… if anything told me …… maybe the voice ……<\/p>\n
It wasn’t bad by any means ….. also very passable ….. pitch was in proper location ….. word usage was appropriate.<\/p>\n
But something about it just wasn’t right to me ….. prolly the reasonance and sing-song qualities …. ‘spose that got me thinking first …..<\/p>\n
But honestly …… I’d probably say I sensed it more than anything else ….<\/p>\n
And that bothers me a lot ….. ’cause here is incredibly passable woman …… but I’m still sensing it …..<\/p>\n
Could others ??<\/p>\n
If so …. I don’t want that to be me.<\/p>\n
And what the heck was I sensing anyways ….. because if I could figure that out …. maybe I could remedy it !!<\/p>\n
I don’t get it …. ’cause I have a few in-person t-friends (yeah, really, ‘magine that) ….<\/p>\n
And though we’ve looked and laughed at their old boy pictures, and I’ve heard their old voices ….. I sense nothing but girl from them …<\/p>\n
And don’t think of them in any other way.<\/p>\n
But here …. I was sensing guy still ….. grrrrrrr<\/p>\n
I just don’t get it …. maybe it’s a generational thing (and don’t any of you dare make a comment about MY age !!! :P) …..<\/p>\n
This gal was well into the generation before me …..<\/p>\n
And though I’m in the last year of the baby boomer cut-off …. most of my friends (except for Shaft …. we’re the same age) …. are X-ers ….. 4-5 years younger than me …. and that’s pretty much the group I identify with …. and behave as ….. WE.<\/p>\n
But that doesn’t make any sense ….<\/p>\n
Because I’ve met some t-girls older than me …. much older in some cases, tyvm …. and I don’t\/didn’t sense anything but girl with them.<\/p>\n
Krap ….. journaling this down hasn’t helped me figure it out ….<\/p>\n
Hmmmm …. maybe I have more defects that I thought.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I’m really struggling with something to journal today ….. That’s odd. Because I have a lot to write about …. so it’s not a dearth of topics …… in fact, I need to write about one event in particular ….. cause I’m curious to evaluate my feelings in a couple of situations. In a completely…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[139],"tags":[],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":139,"label":"General"}]},"featured_image_src_large":false,"author_info":{"display_name":"Amy","author_link":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/author\/amy\/"},"comment_info":12,"category_info":[{"term_id":139,"name":"General","slug":"general","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":143,"taxonomy":"category","description":"","parent":0,"count":775,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":139,"category_count":775,"category_description":"","cat_name":"General","category_nicename":"general","category_parent":0}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/240"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=240"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/240\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=240"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=240"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=240"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}