{"id":1536,"date":"2006-10-24T05:32:35","date_gmt":"2006-10-24T09:32:35","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/amynews.com\/?p=1586"},"modified":"2015-10-08T17:35:24","modified_gmt":"2015-10-08T21:35:24","slug":"oil-change","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/2006\/10\/oil-change\/","title":{"rendered":"Oil Change"},"content":{"rendered":"

I know nothing about cars.<\/p>\n

I’ll admit it.<\/p>\n

Though in the old days,<\/p>\n

I got the presumption of knowledge bestowed upon me,<\/p>\n

And could fake it fairly well.<\/p>\n

But now,<\/p>\n

It’s ugly.<\/p>\n

Recently I had to get the oil changed in Jayne.<\/p>\n

When I pulled in the oil change place,<\/p>\n

The oil change technician walked up to my car and started the checklist of questions they ask:<\/p>\n

Will you please turn your car off?<\/em><\/p>\n

How you been here with us before?<\/em><\/p>\n

What’s your name?<\/em><\/p>\n

Blah blah blah<\/p>\n

Eventually he got to the point of trying to sell me synthetic oil,<\/p>\n

Fuel Injection krap,<\/p>\n

Some air\/gas\/filter valve thing, <\/p>\n

Oh yeah, and …<\/p>\n

Windshield wipers.<\/p>\n

I have no klue,<\/p>\n

So it’s my policy to say “No<\/em>“.<\/p>\n

But then he posed a question caught me off guard …<\/p>\n

“Did your husband tell you what type of oil to put in the car this time?<\/em>“<\/p>\n

I was like,  <\/p>\n

What the phuck?<\/p>\n

Where did that come from … <\/p>\n

Oh. That’s right,<\/p>\n

I’m wearing my fake wedding\/engagement ring set,<\/p>\n

I wore out the night before,<\/p>\n

Best $9.95 I ever spent.<\/p>\n

Guess he thinks I’m married. <\/p>\n

Well,<\/p>\n

May as well have a little fun.<\/p>\n

“Vaseline<\/a><\/em>“, I said, straight faced as one can deliver in such a situation. <\/p>\n

“I think you mean <\/em>Valvoline<\/em><\/a>. I meant the grade, like 10W30. That’s what you have in it now.<\/em>” He offered, amused.<\/p>\n

“I don’t think so, I’m pretty sure he said Vaseline, my husband that is.” <\/em>I countered, krazy talk. <\/p>\n

“Well, there’s no such thing as Vaseline oil, Vaseline is a petroleum jelly. Valvoline is a brand of oil.<\/em>” He provided.<\/p>\n

“You sure seem to know a lot about Vaseline.<\/em>” I tossed out for the heck of it.<\/p>\n

“Yeah, we say the same.<\/em>” someone placing air in my tires yelled.<\/p>\n

“Hmmm, 10W30 ma’am? I recommend 10W30.<\/em>” He suggested.<\/p>\n

“I don’t know, I better check.” <\/em>I said, pretending to call someone. “Hey honey, what type of … what? Third drawer from the top to the left of the range. Hey, what type of earl did you want in the car? Okay. Hello.<\/em>“<\/p>\n

“He said Vaseline.<\/em>” I offered as I set my phone down.<\/p>\n

“Did he want 10W30?<\/em>“<\/p>\n

“He didn’t say, he just told me to remind you to wipe, whatever that means.<\/em>“<\/p>\n

“Ummm, I’m not sure.<\/em>“<\/p>\n

“Wow, don’t you think it would have just been a lot easier to ask me if I just wanted the same oil type I had before, or maybe recommend something different if you thought better, rather than have to deal with this whole ‘what did my husband tell me?’ situation?<\/em>“<\/p>\n

“Very true.<\/em>“<\/p>\n

“Kewl, 10W30, then. And don’t forget to wipe.<\/em>“<\/p>\n

Next time, I’m sending my husband to do that chore ! \ud83d\ude42<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I know nothing about cars. I’ll admit it. Though in the old days, I got the presumption of knowledge bestowed upon me, And could fake it fairly well. But now, It’s ugly. Recently I had to get the oil changed in Jayne. When I pulled in the oil change place, The oil change technician walked…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[140],"tags":[],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":140,"label":"Life"}]},"featured_image_src_large":false,"author_info":{"display_name":"Amy","author_link":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/author\/amy\/"},"comment_info":10,"category_info":[{"term_id":140,"name":"Life","slug":"life","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":144,"taxonomy":"category","description":"","parent":0,"count":48,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":140,"category_count":48,"category_description":"","cat_name":"Life","category_nicename":"life","category_parent":0}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1536"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1536"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1536\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1536"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1536"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/amynews.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1536"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}