Statistically Speaking
Recently,
I was in a court I don’t frequent often,
So I really don’t know the locals,
But I do like practicing in this court,
Nonetheless.
Though in my latest foray there,
I got a bit of a surprise,
‘Cause ya see,
I’m pretty sure …
I wasn’t the only attorney there with a Function.
Now I can’t say for certain this is the case …
As it’s not like it came up in conversation,
And we really didn’t get a chance to exchange …
The hand sign us here transsexuals share with one another as a secret means of identificatioooon.
But still,
Judge,
Prosecuting Attorney,
Defense Attorney,
Defense Attorney.
Half of them with Function.
Anyways,
Probably explains the whole …
“It’s no big deal, been there, done that”
Reactiooooon I got from them …
When I was previously trying to work out the whole name change thing. 
Editor’s Note: I’ve flipped flopped on posting this particular post. I almost feel like I’m outing someone, though I can’t fathom a way where anyone could figure out of whom I’m referring. And it’s not really outing, as this person is much more open about her life than I am. (Whatever !) Anyways, I’m not sure how long I’ll leave this post up. I just thought it was incredibly unlikely that such a thing would happen and felt that it was worthy of sharing that it could.
Maybe the lesson to be learned is that no matter how well we think we “pass” or are “stealth”, there is invariably something about us that will “give us away” to the careful observer, whether it is the size of our hands, our voice, or something else. We are only fooling ourselves if we think otherwise, regardless of how good we look. The good news is that most people don’t care about our past.
Maybe the lesson to be learned is that no matter how well we think we “pass” or are “stealth”, there is invariably something about us that will “give us away” to the careful observer, whether it is the size of our hands, our voice, or something else. We are only fooling ourselves if we think otherwise, regardless of how good we look. The good news is that most people don’t care about our past.
Actually, the question was intended to be more like – why would an officer of the court, in a courtroom where you were not a party to the proceedings but ALSO an officer, out you? And, wouldn’t a reasonable judge point out the irrelevancy of the notation and admonish the offender?
Just to follow up on the “we’re everywhere theme”, immediately after I went to court and got my legal name change, I drove to the driver’s license bureau to get a new d.l. While I was filling out the paperwork, the clerk looked at my name change from guy name to Laura, and said, “I have a friend who did this.”
It freaked me out. Here I am living in a town of 35,000 in Bible belt Oklahoma, and I find another woman who transitioned. I had a chance to meet her. She transitioned years ago, and had her surgery done by Dr. Burou (sp) in Morocco, the surgeon who pioneered the penile inversion surgery. Awesome. This lady is now married, and very few know of her function, except a few close friends and her hubby. Cool….
btw…that pic of you sitting at the bar in your purple top…is stunning. I think you look great in purple…maybe purple is the ne “light blue”???
…the really good news in all of this…apparently…is that the odds are impoving! Hopefully, that translates into an easier transition for all those who still have to navigate the process.
Amy….sounds like a great example of progress (and hope) for all of us!
Yeah … actually, I had a fear she was going to out me … it’s her local court, her community, she’s open about her life, people know her there. Me on the other hand, but for the judge’s staff who I had to work with to correct my whole P number, won’t they ever update their records, thing – it’s not like my Function was public knowledge there. But it’s not like I’d ever mention anyone’s Function in a public setting, I was comfortable she wouldn’t do such either.
Whatever Greg !!! If I’m not mistaken, didn’t you buy me dinner once already when you kids were in Chi-town ?? 🙂 Lawyer standards … sure, you bet !! LOL 🙂
Oh, another thing, you guys got a secret handshake or sompthin’? HOW COOL IS THAT?
The first ts I encountered (that I know of) was in College (I was class of ’78) – she was a professor of Art History, and was transitioning while I was there. “Oh, yea, Kaori, sure. What’s the movie tonight?”
The second (I know of) was my wife’s boss at a newspaper where she worked for a number of years – as I recall, she was just another hard-nosed journalist.
The third and fourth (I know of) were customers at a store where I was manager for eight years – they were out all about it – lovers – and successful mortgage brokers at a now defuunct local S&L. I also had occasion to encounter my first two cd’s (I know of) while there – I remember one was a lawyer, but I don’t remember what the other did. All I had to do was remember to compliment them when they came in Saturday night, and they were as happy as clams.
Then along came my sister, and my acquantance with people who have “functional” differences (that I know of) exploded.
My point is, these are just the people I KNOW of – what about all those I don’t? And why the hell SHOULD I know OR care? I mean REALLY? It’s nobody else’s business! If you had three tentacles growing out of your nose but were the best criminal defense lawyer in the business, I might notice, but would I care? Nope. Why should you?
Would I have you to dinner?
Nope.
(You’re a lawyer – I DO have my standards…)
It happens more often that organisations are prepared for something like ts. Like I’m planning on joining road cycling, so I delicately inquired at my national cycling union about the regulations for someone of my ‘function’. But they didn’t even blink an eye and I got the reply that they more or less take that ‘case-by-case’ and they have a standard set of (unofficial)requirements. Wow, that means that I’m definately not the first girl to join up. Which I found out this week is true …
There are some who fear being outted and others who welcome the chance to talk. A friend of mine was traveling in 1975 and stopped in tiny town in Iowa to do her laundry. While waiting for the dryer she struck up a conversation with a woman. The local had transitioned in that small town several years before and it was the first chance she’d ever had to meet anyone with a similar function. She welcomed the chance to gab.
My friend remarked she wouldn’t have had the courage to transition in such a small town. The local said she wouldn’t have had the courage to transition anywhere else.
Sometimes we process the same problems very differently but successfully never the less.
Yeah, what are the odds? Sometimes the world is really small. It is not that rare to run into TSs at work these days. 🙂 However, the fear that being out by the other is very intense though, especially when stealth. Not an encounter to look forward to.
what are the chances huh? it’s funny, as a TS (I hate that word) I think we’re much better positioned to identify others with similar function. Perhaps it’s because we’re familar with the facial differences in genetic female vs’ us ‘in utero’ females, perhaps we watch for the signs and are always on guard instead of going on auto pilot like most women (signs are you’re on auto pilot these days). As far as outing the person….lets see….practicing in a court you don’t normally practice in, in a county near you or not in 1 of 50 US States (is Texas a State or another Country???)….nope, I think that woman’s secret is safe here on these pages 🙂