Back from Dagobah

It’s my opinion,

That the initial episode of practically any production …

Which has been absent for a long time,

Usually bites.

Case in point: Star Trek: The Motion Picture.

I think it is because too much of that first episode back has to be spent bringing everyone up to speed on things …

Where people have been,

Who they are,

What they’ve been doing,

Tying up loose ends,

Blah blah blah.


The first episode back,

Never really gets to what the viewer wants …

The Story.

And let’s face it …

I’ve been absent a very long time.


That with this first real post back,

I run a great risk of posting something that could actually be a huge let-down for some of my viewers.


Of which,

More often than you might think,

Make a lousy day of mine …

Much, much better.

So I definitely feel a sort of commitment not to post something that sucks …

At least right away. πŸ™‚

And in order to try avoiding the whole Star Trek: The Motion Picture scenario,

I’m going to try something different in this post,

Which is …

I’m going to do a 5 minute trailer (actually, it’s 5 Short Answers to Questions I’ve Been Asked In The Past Couple Of Months) about what’s been going on in my life recently,

Hoping that gives you enough background so that the posts which follow,

Many being extensions of the answers to these questions,

Will make some contextual sense …

Without making this particular post way too boring.

But just in case,

If this post still bites …


I’ll try to do better !! πŸ™‚


Have you found romance?

Romance ?? No. You see, it’s still my personal rule not to date anyone locally. Now granted, it’s really not that much of an issue since in theory one probably does need to be asked out first before properly asserting that they “choose” not to date anyone, but hey, let me feel like I have some say in the matter, k ?? πŸ™‚

Anyways, I really don’t mean to suggest I don’t find any of the guys around here date-worthy, trust me … I was sorely tempted to say Si to the Cowboy Dude and I’d have been equally tempted to say Si to the one electrician in town that hasn’t asked me out that I wanted to ask me out, and there are many others who I’d enjoy hanging out with I’m sure … it’s just that from a practical sense, can you imagine just how hard it would be on a poor guy to date me in my home town where at some point he’s bound to get some grief from “his buds” about dating the girl that used to be a guy or that he’s just dating a guy? Seriously, it would be nice if it was otherwise and that I could find a guy I like here that’d be fine with it, but for now, it’s just much easier for me to socialize elsewhere where the only ones that know my past are my date and me. (Is that there grammar correct Vern? I always screw up that “me or I” rule. Little help here please ! :))

However, never fear …

I am still relentlessly stalking MacGyver.

Are your boobs getting smaller?

Now granted, this is probably one of the more interesting questions I’ve been asked recently. And though it might sound 1.) strange, 2.) perverse, and 3.) rude … in the context in which it was asked, it was none of those.

You see, it was asked by a male friend of mine who I hadn’t seen in probably close to a year, meaning the last time he saw me was probably shortly after my boob job … when my boobs were still high on my chest and very swollen. High and swollen – seriously, there are a few jokes there if you give me a minute.

Anyways … so yes, based on his last visual imprint of me, my boobs are smaller.

Also yes, my first reaction to his question was an internal scream of panic πŸ˜‰ … “Oh my gawd, my breasts are smaller !!

But my second reaction was … “Wow, there are a lot of people from my past that I haven’t seen in so long that probably have the exact same last visual imprint of me” … and though this has more to do with me just being a girl now and little to do with my transsexualism (for those who flunked Remedial Transsexualism and don’t get the difference, you must read the future post on this question before re-enrolling in the class) … it’s a bummer !! That means the last visual imprint which many have of me is when I was still a Work In Process. But then I remembered, we’re always a Work In Process … so it’s no bummer. πŸ™‚

Where is your Star Wars:Revenge of The Sith review?

I’m sorry. I’m really far, far behind in my movie reviews.

But here’s my quick summary of my past three movies:

First of all … I’m pissed. The theater where I prefer to go for my movie viewing pleasure has had a policy change, no longer can I get a frozen Mountain Dew instead of a soft drink as part of the concession combo packages … meaning I have to now purchase an individual frozen Mountain Dew and an individual popcorn and I cannot use my gift discount card which I received when I got my oil changed (ummmm … that’s not code) which had nothing but useless discounts except for the one discount of $2.00 off any concession combo at my movie theater of choice, meaning forementioned gift discount card is now … completely useless.

Now I don’t know about concession stand prices in your neck of the world, but it now costs me roughly $82.00 for a frozen Mountain Dew and small popcorn. Okay, that’s a slight exaggeration, but just a slight one. And I tried everything to talk them out of it … but nothing worked !!

I’m beginning to think they showed a “Be On The Lookout” picture of me stuffing my face with popcorn while slurping a frozen Mountain Dew with two straws during the employee training session on How To Continue The Record Box Office Slump when they announced this new policy !!!


Anyways, I am a creature of habit, so it’s not like I can do anything else …

So I continue to pay the exorbitant price for my frozen Mountain Dew and popcorn fix …

And yes, of course, a small bag of popcorn does not even come close to satisfying me.

But, for those locally who want to know a way to circumvent that rule somewhat …

When you get your popcorn, ask for some extra children’s bags … sometimes you have to get the medium bag of popcorn to get the extra children’s bags, but it’s worth it … because right there in front of them if you’re annoyed enough because frozen Mountain Dews are no longer included in combo options, you can pour your purchased popcorn into the extra children’s bags (usually I get three) and then hand your now empty small or medium bag of popcorn back to them and ask for your free refill … or so I hear, it’s not like I’d ever be so annoyed to try anything like that.

*clearing my throat and looking away* πŸ™‚

Star Wars: Revenge of The Sith – Not bad. After The Phantom Menace and Attack of The Clones, I was very much surprised. The Empire Strikes Back is still the best and A New Hope is second best (though in my heart it is number 1). Revenge of The Sith might actually be the third best … its special effects rocked, it had answers and nice foreshadowing, and there was excitement even though you knew what was coming … I probably need to see it another dozen times though before deciding exactly where it ranks. Return of the Jedi was really, really good until the Ewoks arrived which is when Lucas turned it into the muppet movie. Final rating … 7 out of 10. Warrants Full Price.

Mr. and Mrs. Smith – Suspend reality and ignore the seriously gaping plot holes. It’s got some funny lines, lots of kewl explosions, and Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are simply two gorgeous people who are kinda fun to watch together on scene. I’m so jealous of Angelina Jolie’s body, sans the tatooes, I hope she grows large as she ages … shame on bitter me. Final rating … 5 out of 10. Warrants full price for a date flick, though at this late review date, there are some other better contenders. It still warrants a matinee and is definitely worth a rental.

War of the Worlds – Yawn. Yawn. Yawn. Here’s the entire movie *spoiler alert* – Martians attack, they kick our butt, we run away like wussies, they continue to kick our butt, we continue to run away like wussies, they get sick from our germs and die, we finally stop running away like wussies after having done nothing except possibly coughing on them or something … maybe they drank out of one of the cups we used first. I don’t know … it’s not explained in the movie. Regardless, Final rating … 1 out of 10. If it came on a rewritable DVD, it’s still a waste of a dvd.

Do you want to make a play date to game ?

Get this … there are people out there pretending to me !!! I know !!! They could seriously do so much better !!

I started noticing it a few months ago when I began receiving some strange e-mails from people …

Referencing IM conversations they claimed to have had with me;

Responding to on-line product inquiries; and,

Claiming to have played on-line games with me.

Obviously, my initial reaction was …

I hope they were at least a decent gamer“,

‘Cause otherwise, claiming to be me is simply rude.


This on-line identity theft is justifiably disturbing …

I think most would agree that’s a reasonable reaction,


As long as it’s not a real life identity theft,

It’s not nearly as much of an issue to me.

But …

I’m still left curious as to why anyone would claim my site as theirs,

Knowing that if anyone visiting here e-mailed me,

And used any of the links here to contact me,

The missive would come to me not the identity borrower.

Curious, very curious.

Anyways …

For future reference,

I don’t on-line game, so if you think you’ve gamed with me, you haven’t. Sorry too, because it’s an experience. πŸ™‚

And …

The only person I chat with on-line is my friend Troop Leader, though on rare occasion I do chat here and there with folks on my Yahoo ID, which is amy1985um … so if you chatted with anyone claiming to be me but with a different Yahoo ID, it wasn’t me, but in that case, consider yourself lucky, I’m a fairly boring person to chat with … Troop Leader can attest to that.

Were you off having your GRS during your extended disappearance?

Yeah, yeah, yeah …

Let’s be real,

This is the questiooooon that probably generates the most interest.

Were some of you wondering if I’d even answer it ?? πŸ™‚

*snicker* *snicker*


I am well aware that those who know me in real life are frequently asked by others who are aware, curious, obsessed with my Function whether I’ve had “The Surgery“.

And I’m also well aware that I haven’t mentioned anything about that particular surgery on my website,

Which is why it’s probably the great unknown question,

Because since I’ve shared every other surgery detail on my website,

One would think I’d share the details of this particular surgery,

If I indeed have had it.


Contrary to character …

I didn’t share the details of The Surgery,

Contemporaneous with when I had The Surgery.


Clearly put,

The answer to the Ultimate Question is …


And the answer to whether I have had The Surgery …

Is yes.

I have had The Surgery.

You can stop asking my friends …

I think they’d like that. πŸ™‚

And to my faithful viewers,

I apologize for not being timely in sharing this part of my transition experience.

It’s just that …

Around the time leading up to when I was going to have The Surgery,

My website was becoming viewed by more and more people in my real life.

Which is something I really never planned on happening.

I took several measures to make stumbling across this site in a random search more difficult (not that it couldn’t be accomplished, just a bit more difficult);

And didn’t go around sharing it with others around here except for my closest of friends,

Word of mouth seemed to pass my url along to others,

And my site became read by some of those here in my local community.

Heck, a while, while back …

When I was more frequently posting,



So it was a while, while, while back … πŸ™‚

I walked into a coffee shop here to get myself a morning joe,

And as I was standing in line,

Waiting to place my order,

Just looking around,

I noticed that this dude at the nearest table was reading on his computer !!

And from what I could tell …

And trust me,

I was looking for any reaction on his part to see if he only went there because he saw me come into the coffee shop,

He had no clue I was standing right behind him.

Just some anonymous dude reading my website.

I have no idea who this dude was …

But it’s a seriously weird feeling.

Seriously weird.

And at the time leading up to The Surgery,

I really didn’t want to deal with the feeling of walking down the street,

Knowing there would be people from time to time who would be aware that …

I was going to have The Surgery in X weeks,

Or that I had The Surgery X weeks ago.

I mean,

Come on …

There’s enough stress one endures simply with The Surgery itself,

You really don’t need to add to it by your own doing.

So I chose simply not to share my The Surgery experience at the time I had The Surgery.

And then as one week became two weeks,

And three weeks became four weeks …

Yada yada yada,

I kind of got lazy,

And though I really didn’t decide never to share my The Surgery experience,

I kinda decided,

Eh … yeah, maybe I will someday.

It was really easy for me to just keep that particular experience private.

Anyways …

I guess someday has arrived.

And it’s actually a pretty kewl story.

I only ask that for those of you who know when I really had The Surgery,

That you keep it to yourself.

I’d appreciate it.

I really don’t care to experience the feeling that some might be thinking back in their memory banks …

Yeah … I don’t remember seeing her for a while back then,

And when she came back,

She sure walked funny.


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  1. No – even really big, it’s a lousy club….you still have to carry a big stick….

    (did I really say that?)

  2. Amy,
    Is there anyone else who could have so deftly brought together the two items of Frozen Mountain Dew and The Surgery? I think not!

    It is so great to hear that you’ve now moved on with that part of your life that puts a period on the sentence of this part of your life.

    I -was- worried in the early part of the post when you were talking about Dating. I thought, ‘hmmm, I hope that girl is careful!’ But, of course, you were talking about about Post-Function (is that a new term?) dating, which is much more safe, but still has its small problems.

    You’re one sweet, sassy, smart gal, and I’m glad to have been an iMom to you. You’re going to continue to do great things with your life. I just hope we get to share some of them here.

    Welcome to the Club!

    I now say this with full meaning:

    You Go Girl!

    Triple Big Hugzzz!
    Lisa iMom

  3. AMP
    May I join in with all other commenters (is that a word) and say how great it is to have you back babe. Missed you loads.You have been away too long.You must have such a big backlog, do you think you will be able to fit it all in.

  4. Subliminal influence. It’s a Jedi thing.

    “Those are not the droids you’re looking for.”

    “You do not want the last slice of pizza.”

  5. Yodette…thanks to you, the “uber” adverbial-prefix has become a permanent part of my lexicon…I’m gonna have to work hard to avoid having if worm its way into a court brief…LOL

  6. I’ve been thinking about the dweebs pretending to be Amy, what can you expect? It’s all about the “A” isn’t it? πŸ™‚

    Seriously, I’ve noticed any TS who posts attractive pictures to her blog attracts two types of pretenders. The majority are transvestites who envy and fetishize trans women. They cross-dress themselves in an identity that arouses them as it if was a frilly frock. A smaller but crazier percentage of pretenders are psychotic. Any way you slice it, the pretenders more than creepy. They’re ubercreepy.

    Don’t chum the water for perverts and crazies. Sadly the best advice to limit the number of pretenders is probably to avoid posting photos of yourself.

  7. YIPPEE! Amy’s back! And it’s about damn time! Why do you keep us waiting? We love to hear about the adventures of the Great Amy-Wan!
    What’s this about you being boring. You have NEVER EVER been a boring person to chat with. Now Shaft on the other hand … LOL! Sign on so we can make a play date to game, shop, lunch, whatever. Hugz!

  8. Hey,
    Thanks for all that you have shared. It is such a morale builder for me. You have finished whate I am only starting. I share a bond with you and am so proud of you. I would appreciate all that you are comforatble sharing. Most of all please continue the website and pictures. You are a wonderful woman.

  9. Amy !!!!!! what can i say ?five star rating on the newest info!!! as for the movie reviews great you feel the same as me on the star wars altho i have not see sith yet..sith yet sounds funny huh? well i will have a bootleg copy on dvd to view as i don’t have anyone to go to movies with unless i sneek Jellybean in with me …I KNEW you had surgery you were gone so long and i had a feeling you were up to something i am so happy for you! a big hug from me ok? really i mean it ! big hug!! keep writing please and if you want to share your surgery with me i’d be honored matter of fact you can call me at home i’d give you my number ! have a great week and easy recovery Jenny

  10. Welcome back Amy…that was an excellent 5 minute trailer…I can’t wait to see the entire movie!

    We all missed your wonderfully witty missives and, if we speculated on the “Did she have The Surgery?” question too much, it was only to explain your prolonged absence and not to pry into something so personal.

    …besides, it is a rather irrelavant subject…a person as way cool as you is definitely more than the sum of her “parts”!

    …btw…I love the popcorn refill strategy!…I am definitely using it in the near future…I’ll consider it a partial refund of the exorbitant ticket price that they charge to see Hollywood’s for-the-most-part, sucky movies…

  11. Amy,

    So, SO glad you’re back and “the news” is out. Some of us were having a hard time keeping our mouths shut. (Never been a strong point for me).

    I’m sorta different. I’ve told everyone who will listen because it’s been so exciting and life changing for me. People are starting to say, “Hide, she’s gonna talk about IT again…”

    But I understand your situation. I openly transitioned here, so I really can’t hide it. I do try to woodwork as much as I can though.

    And the dating thing….I totally understand. That’s an issue I’m still struggling to solve. How do I deal with that in a small town? When to tell? Gregory has been an angel helping me deal with some of those issues. His insight is right on…..

    Anyway, it’s wonderful to see you posting again. We’ve missed you terribly.

    Laura a.

  12. Hey u….I haven’t gone anywhere, my brain just ain’t working anymore OMG!!!! anywhose – I’m still reading your posts y’kno.

    Epi III – liked it, sad but nice end or start (I think Epi IV is the best of the lot – WOW factor big time)

    Mr & Mrs Smith – popcorn all the way and excellent chemistry but what would I know.


    Movies I recommend but ya might not understand the gutteral language:

    The Committments (excellent music)
    The Snapper (brilliant)

    both are movies based on Roddy Doyle’s books

    oh and have you heard anything about M.Night Shalaman doing a movie version of Life of Pi?

    I’m tired now…time for sleep on this side of the Atlantic – nite nite.


  13. I was wondering who that girl was wearing the Groucho Marx disguise parked in front on my house πŸ™‚

  14. hey there Aims, for a while there I thought you were going to re-name your site or but I guess that ain’t gonna happen. I’ve kept my trap shut during the whole did she / didn’t she inquisition, for a while I thought there was going to be a tribunal of inquiry – thankfully not. B’cos I’m Irish and prone to verbalization (note US spelling) I can’t help but say this. Regardless of whether or not you had surgery, I think some things should remain private – this being one of them. I’ve met you, you rock, you look hot and you’re soo sweet and I think that sums you up. We are each and every one of us more than the sum of all our parts and should be appreciated & respected accordingly. I like reading b’cos it reads like the script to Gross Point Blank….black humor all the way. I love the way you share silly stuff – it rocks but I appreciate and respect that some things are private….Rock on sister, rock on.

    clio πŸ™‚

  15. Usurping a person’s identity so soon after their death is horrifying enough, but cracking their website and posting as though you were actually that person is downright disgusting. It’s tragic enough that Amy died so young, it’s even worse that you, “Mr Lettner,” would choose to openly flaunt your misdeeds so brazenly. It’s sad and perverted beyond words that you would do this to such a beautiful person, and my undying rage is only satisfied by the fact that I’m providing details of this attricity to the FBI in your area. I hope you get put away for a long, long time, you sick, evil, malformed ogre-excuse for a human being.

  16. Aims-

    I guess draining those Coors Light’s last week (OK, . . . so I had more than one) was a good idea!

    Congrats on “The Surgery”! I’d love to hear all you are willing to share. I am glad you got through it OK!


  17. Nice to know the answer to the Amy mystery “did she or didn’t she?”

    Sometimes we think people know more than they do. A few weeks past SRS and breast implants (moved to town after going FT), I went to the corner store with my boyfriend. The regular clerk whispered to me, “How does he like the new you?”

    Stunned, I didn’t know what to say or do until she put her cupped hands in front of her chest. Ah hah! She means my DDs. I gave her a smile and ok sign. Everyone in town can see my boobs are noticeably larger, but I’m reasonably sure no one has any idea I’m missing something else.


  18. Thanks Fey and Allison !! πŸ™‚

    Laura !!!! *hug* Your comment made me shoot frozen Mountain Dew out my nose !! Too funny !! πŸ™‚

    Opps, sorry I didn’t warn you in time about War of the Worlds Greg !!

    Hee hee Only because the launch got scrubbed Debbie.

    I’ve certainly dropped more than a few hints in the past, but since I hadn’t blatantly acknowledged it, while discussing in annoyingly exhausting everything else I’ve done, seems like my rl friends most common question about me from others was … “Has she had The Surgery?” On a somewhat related note, the most common question I’m asked in rl continues to be … “Is that your real hair?

  19. Well it’s good to have you back and I was for sure enjoying you ‘return’ post. The unveiling that you had ‘The Surgery’ was not really such a big surprise, it made sence that you would have done it by now.


  20. Hey look, everybody, Amy’s back!
    It’s nice, rally nice to hear from you again Amy. We all missed you so much.

    I saw “War of…” last night – what a rip off.
    “Mr. & Mrs” was so formulaic it was almost like -well, Austin Powers.
    Go see “Crash.”


  21. Dear Amy, It is truly understandable that you would like to have some privacy. You have shared so much of your life so freely and I for one am proud to have the opportunity to watch your journey into womanhood. ItΣ³ great to have you back! There are a lot of people who enjoy your witty posts, I being just one. (did I say witty?)

    Keep um coming hun…

  22. Amy,

    That was a long and good writing in a long time. I enjoyed it.

    Sure we all do the funny crab walk after The Surgery. Models do their cat walk, we do crab walk :). It is so nice to be able to walk normal and cross the legs again.


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