Ours
I’ve always like belonging to someone …
Not necessarily in a possessory manner,
But in a “someone liking or caring about me enough to claim me as theirs” sorta way.
Whether I was someone’s son, brother, nephew, grandson, friend, best friend, second baseman, boyfriend, husband, business partner, roommate, neighbor, co-worker, accountant, attorney, whatever …
Whenever a word of definition was used to reference me in a way conveying more personalization than description …
I loved it.
And I still do.
Unfortunately, by transitioning, all those identifiers have been reset …
I’m simply not a term of proud possession anymore.
There’s enough, unspoken discomfort with me, or
Appreciation of the risk of potential embarassment,
That people shy away from engaging in such usage.
I notice it,
It bums me out,
But hey, it’s just part of the deal.
And it’s my goal to be the type of person that someday in the future,
As time passes,
People important to me will again be comfortable enough to claim me as some sort of theirs again.
Anyways,
With that being said …
A few weeks ago I disclosed my function to a couple of clients of mine,
Who over the years have become very, very close and dear friends.
Both knew I had something of significance to tell them when I drove to their town to go out to dinner with them.
I’m not sure what they were expecting,
I think the Hat Maker wasn’t really surprised at all,
While Morning Drive was shocked.
Both were super courteous to me during and after I disclosed,
And both wished me the best afterwards.
I’ve had some contact since then via e-mail,
Just answering some follow-up questions,
Talking through things.
As always … there’s a period of shock after disclosure …
Where people either try to get a grasp on it that works for them to help preserve the friendship … or,
Then don’t try and the friendship either ends harshly/abruptly or just withers away.
Fortunately for me (and them I might add :)),
They both seem to be trying to get a grasp on it in a way that works for them such that our friendship can persevere.
Last night I was exchanging a couple of e-mails with Hat Maker,
She suffers from the insomnia thang too …
Anyways,
She wrote me that earlier in the day Morning Drive was reviewing the AP feed and there was a story about a transsexual,
And that Morning Drive e-mailed her the story prefaced with the introduction …
“Ours is … ”
Followed by a very nice compliment.
“Ours is. ”
Sweet ! 🙂
Granted, some may find the statement bothersome in a way,
Interpreting it to connote that I’m included or claimed as a “token transsexual”.
But that’s not the meaning here …
What was meant is simply a dear friend,
Coming to terms with my function,
And finding it in his heart to offer me a very nice compliment,
While affirming our friendship,
Kewl. 🙂
That loss of the possessory description is one of the hardest. Congratulations on getting back.
Jennifer
Yes, “The Caine Mutiny”. It was a very different role for Bogart, but he played it masterfully.
Oh … and I knew it was Bogey, but I had to cheat for the movie … The Caine Mutiny, right Yodette?
Very topical movie quote ! 🙂
Are you kidding ?? If we need more blogwidth, I’ll just buy more !! 🙂
Though I honestly thought the strawberry stain was down the front of Makenna’s top, not yours … geez, you’d think I was drinking that weekend or something !
Ha…you know I only tease you because I love you….I hope Amy doesn’t mind us using valuable blogwidth debating who’s clumsier than whom….maybe I’ll just call you tonight or tomorrow…
Oh…and I do miss ya both, and I’m not just saying that because of the alcohol withdrawal….
Laura
Grrr….
You ARE tenacious, aren’t you! What four drinks did I tip over? Was I that drunk that I can’t remember?
Ok…just so the airport story is told correctly…
I walked up the ramp from the aircraft to find Laura waiting for me in the check in area. There were lots of people there. I went over to give her a big smooch, and I misjudged the placement of her suitcase by her feet. As we hugged, I lost my balance and fell over onto the carpet. OK. Ya happy?
If I recall, I did beat you at pool!
🙂
M
Uh…you spilled 4, and those are only the ones i saw…and yes, I will admit to dripping some strwberry juice on my white shirt in a brief but undeniable moment of klutziness….why don’t you tell everyone what happened at the airport….or should I 🙂
Laura
“And whats this about strawberries?”
[rattling too ball bearing in my right hand]
“Ah, but the strawberries! That’s, that’s where I had them. They laughed at me and made jokes, but I proved beyond the shadow of a doubt, and with, with geometric logic, that, that a duplicate key to the wardroom icebox did exist.” 🙂
Ah, but young once myself, was I.
🙂
There you two go again…
Listen. I did NOT spill four drinks. (at least not that I can rememeber). And whats this about strawberries? I don’t recall having any of them while I was in Chi-town…and certainly not down my blouse.
On another topic Amy…who are these clients? I thought you dealt with criminals. Its tough to diss your attorney, if she’s the only one standing between you and the slammer!(jest jokin hon…)
Good to hear that at least SOME people are made of the right stuff!
M
🙂 Thank you iMom !
Thanks Yodette … though isn’t that something the Council reminds you of frequently anyways … “She’s your padawan, can’t you keep her under control?” 🙂
But grace isn’t always the way you walk. It’s how you handle yourself in many different ways.
Lisa iMom
Ya know … that’s a good point Laura … in fact, if I’m not mistaken … didn’t she always have a “strawberry down the front of her shirt” incident too ?? 🙂
You do have “padwan” sewed-up. 🙂
my…
oh, my…
:p
I have to agree with you….Grace would not be high on the list of accurate Amy descriptors…., though compared to Makenna and I, you are the epitome of quiet sophistication :-)…well maybe compared to Mak…, she did spill about 4 drinks for everyone one of ours 🙂
Laura
🙂 Thank you !
Grace … grace … I have grace ?? 🙂 Apparently you’ve never seen me trip all over myself in a pair of flip-flops. Sure … I can manage quite well all night long in a pair of cfm’s … but put me in a comfortable pair of flip-flops and I’m a stumbling fool !! 🙂
MY Amy is…
making me very proud about how she continues to have a great life and move forward with great grace.
Triple Big Hugzz!
Lisa iMom