Cinco De … Baked Apple

So after our feeding freenzy at Hooter’s,

During which we had many laughs …

Most at the expense of poor Spuddy,

We returned to the office for an afternoon of flurried work.

I had an afternoon filing deadline to make,

So there wasn’t much time for further goofing off.

Which was nice … as once again,

Though a few things were different,

There was much that wasn’t.

Now though I had been recovering from the cold that kicked my ass the previous few days,

I was feeling a bit of a relapse …

And beginning to wonder how long I was going to last for the day.

Well, really wasn’t wondering how long I was going to last,

I knew the answer to that …

Five minutes longer than it was going to take me to finish the project I had to knock off that afternoon.

But alas,

It wasn’t going to be an uninterrupted ride.

As around mid-afternoon,

I got an e-mail from Baked Apple (f/k/a Morrie, husband of Ex) …

With the Subject of: I told my mom this morning.

Now remember, Baked Apple has been a friend of my since high school, so not only did I know his mom because of that, but she was also my high school algebra teacher (she was a good teacher, pushed me hard and cut me no slack, but it was worth it). It just seems like she has always been one of the adult figures in my life.

Baked Apple and I had talked in the past of when he was going to tell her, and though she was a safe disclosure for months, i.e. she was trustworthy, the timing was just never right for him to have the talk.

And we were really not sure how she’d take it … there were legitimate reasons to be concerned it would not be positive.

As such, I was expecting that to be the focal point of the missive.

So you can imagine my surprise when the first line was …

… guess what? They already knew your story. They’ve known since about the first of the year.

Huh ?? What ??? NO WAY ????

How could they have known My Function since the beginning of the year?

It made no sense.

At the beginning of the year,

Very few people were actually aware of My Function.

Heck, even now …

Today …

I’m still trying not to advertise what’s going on …

I’m trying to maintain Joe’s separate existence, as nominal as it is …

So on those days he needs to appear …

He still can …

To finish his jobs,

Without undo interference from other’s perception of a spectacle in this.

So what the phuck?

My first day in the office,

And I get hit with information that the secret I had guarded and protected so close,

Might of had some leaks??

Yeah, I knew that was possible, and likely in some settings …

I’ve known of a couple of breaches,

One specifically extreme and hurtful.

But I didn’t think the story had legs in those circles.

Krap !

I must have been wrong.

But still, it made no sense.

Sure, Baked Apple’s mom’s calm reaction, and disappointment that she wasn’t told earlier … clearly suggests that she was serious when she said that her and Baked Apple’s dad had known for a while.

But the “who” just doesn’t fit.

If knowing for months as they claim to have known,

There were a very limited number of people that could have provided the information back then.

Granted, Baked Apple’s dad knows a lot of people, but why would I have come up in a conversation?

To discuss what was going on with me … even if it was just idle speculation on the part of someone.

There really was no reason I could think of for why I’d come up in a conversation between Baked Apple’s dad and someone that would have known for certain my function.

But obviously,

Just because I can’t figure it out, there is some reason.

I doubt we’ll ever find out who provided the information.

Baked Apple’s dad knows and appreciates loyalty.

He’ll never reveal who he heard it from.

Now learning this did and continues to stress me some …

I don’t want this for public discussion yet.

Yeah, I know it will be at some point,

But just not yet.

And to find out that in some setting,

It was talked about months ago …

Rattles me.

Unfortunately, I didn’t have time dwell on it at the time.

In so many ways,

My life is all about compartmentalization …

I had work to do,

Deadlines to meet,

And personal life issues/reflections were just going to have to wait.

Wow … it’s only 3:00 o’clock on Cinco De Mayo.

Geez, what a day this is turning out to be.

It’s got to get less stressfull,

Right ??

Sure. You bet. πŸ™‚

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6 Comments

  1. Whoa Amy…Haven’t you ever heard of the grapevine? This is NEWS hon (or at least it was)…the kind that gets told and retold, and retold. It never loses its appeal, until everyone that ever KNEW you knows. Even if you don’t see the connections, they are out there, waiting to be “connected”…and bingo bango, its out.

    But hey, you’re a beautiful woman, and thats how the world is going to see you now. In another couple of months, the dust will settle, and thats all they will rememeber.

    M

  2. Yo yo Claire-lo … sib control phreak extraordinaire … you are exactly right … there’s nothing wrong with a little paranoia, and in my opinion … unless it’s an extreme, a girl’s intuition usually knows when paranoia is warranted !!

    Yes, it did seem to be a positive reaction in the sense that there wasn’t condescension or disgust conveyed … apparently it was a lot of listening and she was somewhat disappointed that he hadn’t told her earlier. Who knows though … I’m sure there will be some subsequent developments ! πŸ™‚

  3. Be careful what you post, too. Somebody found out about my transition by reading a site that I never thought he’d find in a million years. The more you put on the Internet, the more likely you are to be outted in unexpected ways.

  4. hey big sis-ola, for a control phreak like you (and me too!), i think you gotta assume you’re never in as much control as you think you are or would like to believe… paranoia has it’s uses… πŸ˜‰

    but still, seems like this disclosure was nbd…?

    ..claire

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