My Trip to Hell

Well … actually … it wasn’t hell, it was Chili’s …

But since I was meeting Satan there … there was certainly the possibility of an impending inferno.

Anywhoose … for as much grief as I give Satan … and total disrespect we tender to one another …

I know she really loves Shaft …

She knows I’d give my life for Shaft …

Which gives us a common bond on which to build a friendship that would otherwise have nothing upon which to be founded.

And we have in a relatively … moderately … civil fashion.

She knows she can count on me, and I know, I can count on her.

Irrespective of what we think of one another otherwise. 🙂

So I had called her earlier in the day and asked to talk with her privately. Shaft had previously indicated that he’d be watching the kids that evening so she would have the opportunity around 7:00 p.m. I called her, told her I needed to talk about me … that was all that needed to be said … confirmed I wasn’t dying … said Shaft was watching the kids and we agreed to meet at 7:00 p.m.

We sat in the bar … she ordered a beer, and maintaining my no alcohol approach to Disclosure, I ordered an Eddie LeBec pregame drink.

We engaged in an extended period of pre-disclosure chatting … discussing a very interesting development with a friend of her’s … a development which is causing her a great deal of stress …

In fact … she warned me … good naturedly … before my Disclosure … that she couldn’t take much more this week.

Hehe … and in light of how we like to pester each other … that made the thought of my Disclosure and its subsequent mind blowing ramifications so much more pleasant to contemplate !! 🙂

Considering I don’t trust her one bit when it comes to keeping a secret … I spent a little more time than normal on the “Please be discreet with this information” part of my preface … I skimmed over my terminology disclaimer and then went right into it.

“I suffer from a condition referred to as Gender Identity Disorder, a condition often associated with Transsexualism, and a condition which sometimes leads those afflicted to seek a Sex Change Operation.”

Same ol’ … same ol.

She took it well. Knowing it was going to be a serious talk … she had her game face on … and didn’t react strongly. In fact, she went totally into practical-mode … inquirying about specifics, timing and implentation issues.

We laughed about how she totally couldn’t take any more such information this week.

She asked me to please not tell her I have a thing for Shaft …

And after recovering from the immediate tossing of my lunch even hearing such a comment evoked, I assured her it was not a risk and added that I continue to be disturbed by the image created when Shaft and I are in one another’s presence suggesting Shaft would even had a shot with someone like me.

Of course, the back handed insult to her associated with that statement went completely unnoticed. 🙂

I did tell her what a great man her husband was … and what a remarkable friend he has been throughout this for me. Hopefully hearing such good and true words about her husband softened her cold, evil exterior somewhat so Shaft got a little actioooon when she got home.

She seemed to struggle with distinguishing GID from sexual orientation. I tried to address it, but she mentioned a few times how it’d be a lot easier if I was just gay.

She inquired of the extent of my ffs, how my parents were doing with it, who knew and she offered help associated with my ffs recovery.

I told her that it was my experience that after we separated, at some point what we talked about would really hit her and she’d have a bunch of questions … the magnitude of which would almost overwhelm her. And at whatever point she needed, to never hestitate to call and ask questions.

We hugged one another and went our respective ways.

At 11:32 a.m. the following day … the magnitude of what we talked about really hit her and she had a bunch of questions

We talked on the phone with me answering some, and I’m sure more will follow. It’s really nice to be able to talk openly about it. 🙂

Total elapsed time … quite long actually … 2 hours and 20 minutes. And despite the angst I always experience spending any more than 3 minutes in the presence of Satan … it was probably my most fun Disclosure yet. 🙂 Totally comforting and a tumbs up to Satan. She was totally cool and understanding. Just going to prove my theory once again … “things are a lot more fun when you just don’t care !” 🙂