Painting the Garage
So I helped my mom and dad paint the inside of their garage Saturday … it was a totally spontaneous project on my part …
I had met my parents for breakfast … and at the restaurant they mentioned that they were going to put a second coat of paint on the interior walls that they recently had drywalled in their garage …
So I offered to help … and they gave the token objectioooon … “Oh no, we’re fine” … but I could tell … they could use another bod working the roller … so I told them I’d run home and get some paint clothes on and be over to help …
Which I did … while also working in a 45 minute phone conversation via cell during the commute with the stupidest client I have ever had … it’s amazing … I honest to gawd think I’m talking to a rock with him … at first I thought he was just a liar … ’cause though I’m like the only person it is totally safe for them to tell the truth to … they rarely do … I get lied to alot …. anyways … this particular client … is simply a ds … and not only that … I haven’t talked with him once where he has belched … OUT LOUD !! … and not realized it, or at least acknowledged it !
Anyways … I got to mom and dad’s and went my bathroom (yeah, okay, it’s not MY bathroom, but I like it, so I staked a claim to it) … and threw on some painting jeans and a tee …
And went to work … and it was work !!! Geezuz !!
The garage had high ceilings, at least it so seemed,
And there were lots and lots of walls …
Well, really only three and one with a bit needing painting over the garage door …
Hmmm …. maybe I’m just a painting wimp :),
Anywhose, it looked good when we were all done.
And afterwards … when I went back to MY bathroom to clean-up … I noticed a couple of things … since it was work … my boy hair-gel had dissipated for the most part, and Amy hair had appeared (which I sorta expected) … but also … the painting Tee I threw on was a little more snug than I realized … and thinner than I realized … so my compression undershirt that I wore beneath was not only apparent, but didn’t compress my tastefully understated hooters as much as I would normally expect … so as a result … I was pretty much in Amy-mode during that painting project, absent the lipgloss.
Which, let’s be real … doesn’t happen by accident … I fully intended to do it … I briefly thought of firming up the boy presentation when I went home to get some painting clothes, but … though it might appear on the face contrary to my whole “separate presentations only” rule … I felt it was time to tweak the norms a bit with my parents … to expand the envelope some … to start easing into their minds … the reality … that I can help the family when needed, that I can laugh and joke around when doing such, that I can contribute good ideas in doing those things … basically, that I’m still me … even though looking, being and interacting … differently.
Of course, when I do such things … it’s bound to have an effect !! 🙂 And it did.
My mom asked me a couple of questions about Amy afterwards … nothing major really … and actually, I’ve got to call her up, ’cause though I think I answered the questioned correctly, I might have totally misunderstood what she was asking. I find it interesting how she’ll mention Amy by name now, refer to her as another person, and though she’s clearly distressed, unhappy, and bothered about this … she seems to be getting more comfortable talking with me about it. 🙂
And my dad and I had a great conversation Sunday night … he doesn’t lecture, he doesn’t judge, he asks questions, guides the conversation … he does it really well 🙂 … anyways … he wants me to set up a meeting with my head doc for him and my mom … which I’ll do … though I’m so not optimistic that’ll be a good thing … Dad mentioned again how my Option 4 Analysis was ridiculous … how I’m needed and wanted … and how I must have gotten that analysis from someone else … we didn’t get into it in much detail, but some of those statements were interesting to me … I’m wondering if the reference to me possibly having “gotten that analysis from someone else”, might mean they think I’ve gotten sort of brainwashed into thinking I have this condition, that these are not my true feelings, insight or thought, but suggested, misguided, but others. Might be why they wanna meet my head doc. I also think it’s interesting how people just don’t realize that … I still totally stand behind my Option 4 analysis. We also talked about how he needs a better explanation, one he hopes he can obtain and understand from a health care professional, for why I would chose Option 1, with really only one advantage listed, over Option 3, where I had several advantages. I think he understands it’s a “weighting” issue, but what I think he’s really trying to get a grasp of is just how much pain I really am in, how much discomfort I really feel, why would it be so hard to continue doing the boy thing … when for all appearances, I don’t seem that unhappy. I think that’s in part because of my personality … I tend to make the best of a situation, tend to look for positives, and tend not to complain. So in most people’s eyes, even including those in the know … they have no clue how much I suffer. It really was a good conversation. We talked like we normally converse … witty, with intelligence, humor, reflection, and seriousness … nothing was really answered, no way it could, but the dialogue continues, which is good, and the openness remains, which is good. 🙂
I’m glad I helped paint the garage ! 🙂
lisa–
i’ve never measured comments,
but yours here is easily among the longest
ten percent…
meanwhile, aims,
my son loves family matters,
and we were recently watching the episode
in which carl is transformed into a nerd;
if you can find it,
you might try watching it with your parents…
you know, near the end,
Stafan has the epiphany–
he’s so cool,
and everybody loves him,
except himself,
because he’s not real,
he’s just everything everybody
would like him to be…
Longest comment, eh? Hmmm
What can I say?
I guess I never met a word I didn’t like to use!
no voce
I swear I am sooo gonna call you
Hmmmm … no … why ?? Though I could offer some suggestiooooons … let’s see, I haven’t posted any new pics up, which have been in the works for a while, I haven’t posted samples of my voice, which I promised you eons ago, hmmm … I’m sure there’s more … why?? why do I suck ?? (minds outta the gutters people, we’re not talkin’ that kind of suckin’ !! 🙂 )
Yeah Stacy, actually I suspect they’ve heard something along the Leach or Dobson line … now granted, I like Fox myself for most of my news, but my parents mentioned seeing something about TS’s on Fox a few weeks ago and that they mentioned other methods for managing TS’ism. When I asked what methods they offered, they just said there were other methods, no specifics were given. Further, I’m not sure if it was even TS issues being addressed, it could have been TV or CD, which seems to find its way on Fox more than anything else. I’m sure that might have offered some false hope to my parents and might be part of the issue.
do you know why you suck?
Lisa … in addition to now holding the record for the longest comment ever at AmyNews.com … wooo hooo way kewl !! … you make an incredibly good point which is the gist of a post I’m keying out … but for Shaft, people haven’t been able to see or realize how much happier, at ease, and non-distracted I am when I’m not having to play Joe Hairdy. I do think that seeing that will help some people down the line.
ROFL Hey … Si !! Welcome back from vacatiooon ! lol
can we go back to telling you how much you suck now?
Amy,
the conversation with your Dad, he’s probably wondering how you could consider Option 1 since you were so happy as this “Joe” character. It’s really the combination of several things.
1) You learned early on how to play this “Joe” character well. You learned everything everyone else wanted from “him”, and you gave it to them. From an early age, “Amy” was kept in the background, underdeveloped, unlike any other girl who would have learned to be a full person, a happy person. This isn’t to say “Amy” isn’t a happy person, but that journey was much more difficult, and couldn’t be completed like the “Joe” journey.
2) You’re obviously an intelligent person. Intelligent people learn to fit in to situations that they feel they can’t control. You did that from an early age. Part of fitting in was perfecting “Joe Hairdy”. Another trait of intelligent people is to make the best of the situation.
3) Ask him how he would feel if your medical condition was a withered arm. And now, there was surgery that could fix that arm, so that it was just about normal? It’s really just changing very few of the arguments that would be made about TS’ism.
I still go back to an old argument to those who just don’t understand:
Dad, if someone came in the middle of the night and kidnapped you, took you away to a clinic and performed sex change surgery, and made you appear female, and then let you go in that city, where everyone called you Miss, would that make you a woman? Of course not. YOU are the person inside, not the window dressing on the outside.
For whatever reason, nature (or God, if that’s your belief) made you the way you are, all mixed up. Medical Science has come to the point that you can be fixed up, not unlike a cleft lip, or that withered arm mentioned before, so that you’re pretty much normal.
Part of what’s made a big difference for a lot of girls is the easy access to information on the Internet. What before was a taboo to find out about, embarrassing to find in the library, is now just a click away. People know now more about this medical condition, and thankfully, they’re learning earlier in life. The standard response so many times is “I thought I was the only one” or “I wasn’t like those people on Jerry Springer or Sally Jesse Raphael” so I didn’t think I was a Transsexual. It was just so hard.
I think your Dad needs to see how happy you are as Amy, and see there’s a difference between that and you as Joe.
That’s my opinion, it should be yours too! 😉
you don’t suppose they’ve been listening to
doctor dobson?
or narth?
their poor son
a victim of the gay agenda?
let’s hope not…