Elevator Shaft

So it’s phreaking pouring rain …

As Shaft and I made it to our parking garage.

Now for those not familiar with our parking routine,

We always park on the top-most floor in our parking garage,

IJ,

That way our cars are covered from the elements,

And we can always remember where we parked.

As we approach the elevator,

The power flickered,

Elevator lights went out briefly,

Then returned.

Working.

“So, feeling like living on the edge?“

I said,

Knowing that there’s no way we would really opt not to take the elevator.

And since Shaft didn’t even answer me,

Just followed me into it …

Klearly I was correct.

I don’t remember what we gabbed about during the ride up …

Probably nothing.

But I do remember that the ride to IJ seemed pretty routine,

And that we were almost there …

When the power went out again,

Causing us to be stuck between floors.

It’s really been years since Shaft and I had a new adventure …

I miss them.

So I totally enjoyed the idea of having another !

Woo hoo !!!

You have to take advantage of adventure opportunities people,

You never know if it will be the last …

And it would suck to let one go to waste !

As such,

I decided to engage in some active Amy photojournalism,

To commemorate the event, ya know.

Oddly though,

Shaft found my attempts to document said adventure utilizing the former of the …

“A picture is worth a thousand words” premise,

Annoying.

“Stop taking pictures.“

“Put that *&$# camera phone away.“

“Another five minutes and I would have shoved that camera phone down your throat.“

Odd too,

Considering that for all but about 5 minutes of the entire time of our 30-45 minute ordeal …

Commencing within moments of the elevator stopping,

He engaged in active broadcast journalism,

Calling everyone on his Treo with a speed-dial number and announcing he was stuck in an elevator.

“Hey guess what? I’m stuck in an elevator. Nobody, just Amy.“

“Hey … me again. No, we’re still in the elevator. We just saw the fire truck go past down below, so we have help on the way. It’s really getting warm in here.“

“Duuuuuuuude, guess what? No, I went before I left. I’m stuck in the parking garage elevator. Just me and Amy. And I’m going to break that &*%$ camera phone of hers if she doesn’t stop taking pictures.“

Whatever.

Actually, I only asked him to participate in one photo that could have been construed as annoying.

And he wouldn’t even do that.

(I thought it would be funny if I got a picture of him sitting on the floor looking like he was gnawing on my arm …

Cannibalism,

It’s always good for a laugh. 🙂 )

Amyways …

Uber, major props to our city employees,

Both in the parking structure and the fire department.

Shaft,

Taking advantage of the opportunity to continue avoiding conversation with mwah by working yet another telephone …

Used the elevator phone to call the fire department and let them know we were stuck in the elevator.

They asked how many were in the elevator, and …

If anyone needed medical attention,

A series of excellent qualifier questioooons in all.

The one they stumped us on though was “in which elevator are you located“?

Now despite the fact that the parking ramp name and elevator identifier (location) are prominently,

And I mean prominently …

Displayed,

In phreaking big letters black letters against a white background right next to the emergency phone,

And on a large, even more detailed sign at sight level above the emergency phone,

And on yet another sign in Braille …

Shaft and I both stumbled trying to describe in which parking garage and elevator we were located.

Seriously,

How can we not know that?

We’ve just park there every workday for the last five, six years.

What butts.

Anyways,

Shortly after hanging up with the fire department,

Parking garage personnel arrived,

And yelled at us from the other side to let us know they knew we were in there.

I took their call yell,

Because Shaft was in the middle of another broadcast talking to someone else on the phone.

The parking lot personnel …

Also asked us if anyone needed any medical attention,

Inquired how many were in the elevator,

And told us they would wait right outside the door there until the fire fighters arrived to rescue us in case we need to let them know of anything.

Professional, classy, top notch.

I was very impressed.

The fire fighters soon arrived and let us know they would be getting us out.

It didn’t take them long at all to get there.

We could hear them making noise on the other side.

At one point they must have opened up the outer elevator doors,

And then accidentally dropped something …

Which made a loud, banging, dropping noise.

It scared the this out of me,

This being an anagram.

Wow !

We could also hear them fairly clearly trying to strategize the safest way to get us out of the elevator …

Looking at the floor above us,

And the one below us,

Trying to decide which way to take us out.

In case you’re wondering,

For those with dysfunctional senses of humor …

Such as Shaft and I,

Three phrases that are really funny to hear when you’re stuck in an elevator are:

It’s in the absolute worse place it could possibly be.

I don’t like this one bit.

It’s going to be a really tight squeeze.

We were laughing !!!

And it wasn’t nervous laughter.

It was good adventure laughter. 🙂

Obviously we must have been stuck almost right in the middle between floors.

Finally the fire fighters decided how they want to take us out,

And opened the inner elevator doors from the upper floor.

Calm, cool, collected …

And uber, safety conscious.

These guys rocked !!!

They were like checking and double checking shut-offs,

Ladder placement,

Making sure brackets were secure,

All that krap.

I felt like I was in an operating room with all the talk and double checks taking place.

You couldn’t help but feel safe.

Amazing they were.

We handed them our belongings before we started to climb up the ladder they had dropped down into the elevator.

Shaft even let me exit first …

Sweet.

My virgin opportunity to take advantage of the whole “women and children first” courtesy.

Though just for the record,

As I was climbing up the ladder,

He did say something along the lines of …

“Put that &*(^%$# camera phone away before I break it.“

Though in my defense,

One of the fire fighters thought it was fine and even said …

“Hey, is that a RAZR?“

It was sort of a tight squeeze-me getting out of the elevator,

Mainly because the angle of the ladder we used to climb out took up some space …

’Causing us to have to sort of veer off to the left of the ladder when we made out final exit move.

The fire fighters and parking lot personnel were on the other side …

And made sure we were all fine.

Turns out four fire fighters came to rescue me.

Honest to gawd,

That’s like every girl’s dream.

I love fire fighters,

Though that’s a well known Amy Truism. 🙂

The fire fighters even let me wear one of their helmets and take a picture.

And guess what …

Turns out when we climbed out of the elevator,

We were on our level where our cars were located,

Right on IJ.

Well but,

That concludes this Adventure With Shaft,

In five years,

When we tell the story,

It’ll be much more exciting and embellished,

Just give us time. 🙂

Mucho thanks to the parking lot employees and fire fighters that rescued us.

You’re the best.

Oh yeah,

And if any of you want to see the pictures I took of the incident,

Faces smudged out to protect others privacy, of course …

You can find them here.